Wounded by Words: Healing the Invisible Scars of Emotional Abuse  -     By: Susan Titus Osborn, Karen L. Kosman, Jeenie Gordon
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Wounded by Words: Healing the Invisible Scars of Emotional Abuse

New Hope Publishers / 2008 / Paperback

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Product Description

Caustic words can cut through the heart like a knife, leaving lasting emotional scars. But there is hope! Drawing on scriptural examples of emotional abuse, as well as their personal experiences, Osborn, Kosman, and Gordon offer insights on how to combat this invisible destroyer and work toward healing and wholeness in Christ. Paperback.

Product Information

Format: Paperback
Number of Pages: 240
Vendor: New Hope Publishers
Publication Date: 2008
Dimensions: 8.50 X 5.50 X 0.62 (inches)
ISBN: 1596690496
ISBN-13: 9781596690493

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Publisher's Description

In Wounded by Words, the authors explore how emotional abusers isolate, disorient, and indoctrinate their victims and how their unkind words leave lasting scars. Sharing personal stories of people from the Bible and from contemporary life who have suffered verbal abuse, the authors offer tested, scriptural advice for breaking the cycle. Readers will learn how to recognize the signs of verbal or emotional abuse, change abusive patterns, and rediscover hope.

Publisher's Description:

In Wounded by Words, the authors explore how emotional abusers isolate, disorient, and indoctrinate their victims and how their unkind words leave lasting scars. Readers will learn how to recognize the signs of verbal or emotional abuse and change abusive patterns. Readers who feel rejected and worthless because of the abusive words of a parent, spouse, intimate partner, or other person will rediscover hope. Through the study of GodÂ’s Word, prayer, and advice from a counselor and other victims, readers will see their distorted self-images begin to change. As they lay down a new life foundation, with Jesus Christ being the cornerstone, readers can begin to erase old, destructive tapes that replay in the mind and gradually renew hope and faith.

The old adage, "Sticks and stones may break your bones, but names will never hurt you," is not true. Unkind words leave lasting scars, affecting how we deal with every aspect of our lives. Verbal abusers isolate, disorient, and indoctrinate their victims. Words can be either boulders that crush and destroy a person or building blocks that create a solid foundation and strengthen self-esteem. A parent’s comment in a moment of anger can create an identity crisis that lasts a lifetime for the child. Comments like, "I wish you’d never been born," "Can’t you do anything right," and "How can you be so stupid," create a feeling of rejection and worthlessness. Old tapes continue to play in her mind, setting up a cycle of failure in relationships that is carried on from generation to generation.

The victim needs to lay down a new foundation for her life with the cornerstone being Jesus Christ. Through studying His Word, prayer, and counseling by others, her distorted image of herself begins to change. She begins to erase the old, destructive tapes in her mind. Gradually her hope and faith are renewed. She comes to the realization that she does not deserve to be put down with demeaning, caustic words.

Wounded by Words contains twelve chapters filled with personal stories of people who have suffered verbal abuse. The issues these people have learned to deal with will help the reader confront her denial, make her realize others have experienced what she is going through, and provide hope and wholeness as she seeks answers. We will transition from one story to the next with inspirational thoughts, biblical truths, and practical advice for the reader.

In Scripture, the stories of Leah, Joseph, Hannah, Job, Abigail, King David, Mary Magdalene, and Mary and Martha demonstrate examples of verbal abuse. How they overcame this invisible destroyer is encouraging to us all. These stories demonstrate how God dealt with emotional abuse in biblical times, and he expects us to deal with this issue today as well.

Author Bios:

Susan Titus Osborn, Karen L. Kosman, and Jeenie Gordon all suffered emotional abuse as children. Karen and Susan both continued the cycle by marrying verbally abusive men. Today both are remarried to supportive Christian husbands, and the cycle of abuse has been broken. Both are inspirational speakers and writers. Susan has published 28 books, and Karen has had many articles and stories published in books and magazines. Jeenie, as a licensed marriage and family therapist for 20 years, has counseled many verbally abused patients. She has published five books, one of which was a Gold Medallion finalist.

Product Reviews

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  1. Canada
    Age: 35-44
    Gender: Female
    4 Stars Out Of 5
    A Christian Approach
    May 16, 2011
    Age: 35-44
    Gender: Female
    "Emotional abuse" is a phrase that triggers a variety of knee jerk reactions depending upon the background of the reader. To some, emotional abuse sounds like a concern that just isn't valid - a victim-based mentality. To others, they know they've been battered by words but are shy of the term because of its connections to secular psychology. Three women who have survived and overcome emotional abuse have teamed together to write Wounded by Words - a Christian approach to healing the emotional and spiritual damage that this abuse can create.

    I was pleased to find that the authors integrated biblical accounts of people who struggled with verbal abuse from those around them. Though we don't normally think in terms of biblical personages suffering from emotional abuse, it's fairly easy to see that the examples given were mistreated unfairly by many of those around them who should have loved and cared for them. Scripture verses are also included along with space for personal reflection at the end of each topical chapter.

    I did have a difficult time distinguishing from the various author's contributions, but that is often the case when there are several contributors to a work. Each of the women does share her personal stories, experiences, and triumphs - there are even some personal poems included. I just wish I had been able to more concretely cement them with each woman in my mind. There are also personal accounts shared from others in addition to the authors, which makes it doubly difficult to keep track of everyone. (I did like the wealth of stories, examples, and experiences though!)

    Thankfully, this book is full of hope. It encourages readers to press onwards and upwards in forgiveness and seeking to love like Christ while maintaining healthy boundaries. I love the authors' emphases on turning to God's Word and His love for the foundation of one's identity in Christ. Rather than letting the lies and accusations of the enemy and those who unwittingly spew those falsehoods to determine one's self-perspective, readers are encouraged to turn to God and His ways to determine the truth about themselves.
  2. United States
    3 Stars Out Of 5
    March 2, 2011
    United States
    Quality: 3
    Value: 3
    Meets Expectations: 3
    Ever wondered if you were being too sensitive when someone said something that hurt your feelings? The authors of this book will show you how to make hurtful comments work for you and not against you. You will learn that you are not alone in being hurt by words. Using plenty of examples to help you understand how to handle comments that have discouraged you emotionally is the main focus of the book. Page after page is filled with different people who have dealt with being hurt and have overcome the wounds. Not every example may seem to apply to your situations but you can still learn how the person handled the hurt and how they were able to get on with their lives. The book is a good resource for people who have been hurt by the words of others and want to see that they are not alone. Filled with excellent examples of God's healing powers you will be encouraged to grow through your own experiences into a better person.

    I was given this book by christianreviewofbooks.com to review
  3. 5 Stars Out Of 5
    August 18, 2008
    C. Yvonne Karl
    Wounded by Words should be read by every minister and counselor who then should require their clients to read it. The book is neither preachy nor condemning, rather it is embracing and freeing to all who have suffered abuse in its many forms. The Reflections at the end of each chapter lend themselves to personal inquiry as well as a catalyst for group discussion. An excellent contribution toward the goal of freeing women from the prison of abuse.
  4. 5 Stars Out Of 5
    May 15, 2008
    Shirley Brosius
    Through stories about real people, Wounded by Words alerts readers to abusive situations. Perhaps a woman never questioned the responsibility heaped upon her shoulders as a child. A man may have thought a teacher had the right to call him disparaging nicknames. Adults may take for granted the unkind words of a spouse or an employer. Readers may recognize themselves in the stories, which make up a large part of the book, and will also learn of the damage such experiences cause. Far too often, the authors say, the abused become abusers.Authors Susan Titus Osborn, Karen L. Kosman and Jeenie Gordon are well qualified to write this book. All three experienced emotional abuse in their youth and married men who also battered their self esteem. Jeenie is a licensed marriage and family therapist while Susan and Karen are inspirational speakers and writers who find their stories resonate with women everywhere. Poems express the heart cries of those who suffer.But these authors write far more than stories. They offer insightful comments and practical suggestions for setting boundaries and confronting those who wound us with words. Parents will learn effective survival skills to teach children being bullied. And each chapter closes with scriptural stories of abuse that offer hope. With Gods help, lives can change. Readers are encouraged to be honest about themselves and their situations through thought-provoking, end-of-chapter Reflections.Read this book if youre wondering whether interpersonal problems today may be caused by events of the past. Depression, behavioral problems, and physical illnesses are often direct outcomes of emotional abuseoften resulting in invisible scars, state the authors. Read this book if youre seeking guidance to handle verbal abuse or if you feel angry or find yourself saying things you regret. And even if you dont experience abuse in your own life, this self-help book will better prepare you to minister to those who do.
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