The Bible begins and ends with marriage, and right in the middle, we have an entire book, the Song of Songs, devoted to the romance of marriage. God called Israel His wife, and the church is called the Bride of Christ.

Marriage is blessed, and Gary Thomas has written a marriage-changing book asking the question, "What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?"

That question changes the entire focus from how marriage will bring me happiness and pleasure to how I can bring glory to God through my marriage.

In this selfie-focused age, this type of thinking startles us. Thomas reminds us that "Marriage calls us to an entirely new and selfless life" (p. 23). Through that life, we grow more intimate with God and with our spouse. We see our marriage as sacred.

From sinful stinkers to prayerful partners, from selfish scoundrels to serving saints, readers will recognize the walk through marriage that we are taking is a Christian journey toward our Holy Father - it's a sacred walk, and we are on a sacred mission.

To accompany the book, Thomas has also created a six-week small group DVD series and participants' guides that is changing the marriages of several couples in our small group. This is a powerful series.

"Marriage has led me to deeper levels of understanding, more pronounced worship, and a sense of fellowship that I never knew existed. 'Sacred' isn't my brand; it's my way of life. And applying it to my marriage has transformed every one of my days" (p.13).

I had read so many good reviews about Gary Thomas' teaching and so I ordered this book (several of them) to give as Wedding gifts to friends. I also kept one for myself, read it and found myself nodding in agreement with Gary's timeless message of Holiness over happiness. The idea extrapolated in the book extends itself to all kinds of relationships, not just marital ones (since I am not married). Gary delivers a lesson steeped in Scripture that invites us all to see beyond the ephemeral pleasures of the moment! Thank you!

This book has been on my reading list for years. So many of the wives I look up to list it as one of their favorite books on marriage. I love reading books that help me become the best version of myself, and in this new role of wife there's plenty of room for improvement!

The subtitle of this book is so poignant: "What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?" Our culture shouts the opposite: test-drive the opposite sex, use others before marriage, it's all about your happiness and your gratification. It's no wonder we have so many divorces in our society when we're encouraged to simply focus on our own happiness all the time!

Author Gary Thomas radically challenges us to the opposite in this book. He asserts that God intended marriage to sanctify us, to make us holy. And sanctification involves pruning, molding, burning away our selfishness. The beautiful thing about this realization is that it no longer becomes about you. The pressure is off for a perfect marriage of perpetual happiness (which doesn't exist anyway!). Instead, your marriage becomes an offering to God, a union open to His hand and His transforming power.

Thomas gives historic, spiritual, and practical insight within these chapters. I would highly recommend this book to any couple discerning marriage, engaged, or already married. As an added bonus, my husband and I are reading the devotional that accompanies this book: Devotions for a Sacred Marriage. It's been neat to have him experience the same principles in devotional form that I'm reading in the longer book.

Christmas is coming up in two months! Either book would make a cozy read by the fire...and might stir those coals in your marriage, too.

Have you read Sacred Marriage? What's your favorite book on relationships?

The main thesis of the book is that marriage is designed to make us more like Jesus. The result of "Jesusness" is more important than happiness. The process of identifying and killing our own selfishness and pride is a very gruesome and painful journey. This is most amplified in marriage. However, the end result is far more loving, joyful, and peaceful than an alternative self-centered path. The labor involved through marriage can count for something so amazing that the most tired spouses will still sing praises to the joy of marriage.

If you are serious about serving the Lord with your life and in your marriage this is a must read book!