Real Men Don't Text (from Tyndale Publishing) offers a new approach to dating that helps to eliminate the confusion over where a relationship is headed and who's really interested in you. I had to read this book, as I have daughters beginning to date and sons coming up behind them that will be entering into relationships. I'm glad I did read it, and I'll encourage my children and other young adults to read it, as well.
Text messaging, instant messaging, snapchat, facebook - they all offer great ways to communicate and stay in touch with friends, but they also bring challenges to dating relationships. More and more, guys are asking girls for last minute hang-outs that leave a girl wondering if it's a date or not. Is he interested or not? Am I a friend, or something more? Trying to read between the lines of a 2 sentence text is virtually impossible.
Ruthie Dean had been through a series of bad relationships before she made the decision to not accept text-messaged invites. She made the decision to reply - "that sounds good, but call me to discuss it." Some guys would take the initiative to call, others wouldn't. Michael Dean called ... and kept calling.
Real Men Don't Text is a very easy book to read and relate to. The chapters alternate between Michael's point of view and Ruthie's point of view, though most of them are coming from Ruthie's experience as a girl trying to navigate the dating world. Sprinkled throughout the book are descriptions of "The Man You're Dating" such as "Mr. Promised He Would Call" and "Mr. Fixer-Upper". This isn't done for man-bashing, because the whole point of the book is that there are bad relationships everywhere, and guys looking for a pretty face to hook up with ... BUT if you wait, there are also great guys out there looking for wives.
The book also has Text Translation 101 blurbs scattered through the book. This one takes those ambiguous and confusing texts (taken from real situations shared with Ruthie) and interprets them. Most of the time, the translation is ... "He isn't interested in a long-term committed relationship, so move on." This book is about having respect for yourself, and making wise dating decisions that reflect your true worth. You are more than an object, more than a fling, more than occasional entertainment, more than just a pretty face.
Real Men Don't Text includes many personal stories of other women who've made dating mistakes, and learned from them. You are not alone. I love the chapters on Real Red Flags, Real Turnoffs, Real Men Grow Up, and Real Connection. These came later in the book, but they took the premise of the book and applied it. They help differentiate between a relationship built on a godly foundation, that's headed toward marriage ... and ones that are headed for disaster.
I highly recommend this book for every young lady entering the dating world!!
The core idea behind this book is great. Guys man up and call. Technology has changed the way the dating scene looks and our younger generations need to be aware of this. Things didn't always work like this.
The authors do a good job of sharing personal testimonies as well as sample texts with the supposed translation.
The two issues I had were all guys seemed to be considered equal and it is always the guys fault.
Lookin for love in all the wrong places seems to be a recurring theme.
There is some good practical advice but would like to have a bit more scripture and a few less personal examples making it seem as though the authors experiences are the only way things can go.
I may recommend it depending on the individual and depth of faith.
This book was sent complimentary by Tyndale house publishers for my review.
Real Men Don't Text: A New Approach To Dating, written by Ruthie & Michael Dean, is a book that centers around dating within the advanced technological/digital age.
Those of us who have flown past a greater number of birthdays over the years can attest to the fact that things have certainly changed within society, and this change comes from the many advances in technology. Technology has infiltrated all areas of our lives in an enormous way, even in regards to dating.
This publication, with technological advancements in mind, deals very well with current dating issues. Within its pages, you will find advice on issues such as, but not limited to, disappearing men, cryptic messages, disappointing relationships, the false intimacy of on-screen connections, purity, body image, and red flags for bad dates.
This publication, primarily written for women, presents its subject matter from a Christian perspective but can very easily be utilized by any person, whether a believer or not. Each chapter closes with a unique summary that is held to "140 Characters Or Less." This presents itself a great tool for refreshing one's memory on the chapter or allowing the reader to refer back to the topical matter in the future without feeling the need to read through the entire chapter again.
This book, because of its relevancy within society today, is a recommended read; and for you fathers out there, it would make a great gift for your daughters.
One of the things I did not realize before reading "Real Men Don't Text: A New Approach to Dating" is that it's written for women. I made the assumption that since it was written by a couple, it would deal evenly with male and female approaches to dating, but that was not the case.That being said, as a man, I still really enjoyed this book. Throughout its 14 chapters, it's a captivating read as the authors write in a very conversational tone. Yet, in the midst of their candid storytelling, they provide practical advice to anyone involved in the dating game.
I found this book to deal with current and relevant dating issues, including purity, body image, red flags for a bad date, turnoffs, finding the right man, and online dating. The bold lists in the chapters make for a quick and practical takeaways. Furthermore, this book is written with a Christian perspective (which I believe is important to this topic); however, the manner in which they deal with faith allows this book to be read by any person (believer or not) without feeling uncomfortable. I thoroughly enjoyed the chapter summaries "in 140 characters or less," too. I thought that was quite creative and fitting given the topic. One of my favorite lines, and perhaps an appropriate summary of the book, was, "She had traded in her desire to be with the right guy for a desire to be with someone right now." If you are tired of that being true in your life, this is the book for you to help break that cycle.
There were a couple things I wish were done differently within these pages, too. First, as mentioned, this is a book written for women. I feel like there may be a missed opportunity here as men could benefit heavily from their advice as well. Secondly, and I know this was an issue dealt with delicately in the book, but I did not agree with the authors' perspective on body image. In particular I did not agree as they said, "[Women] are never, ever responsible for the lust of a man, regardless of what you wear or don't wear." While I hear the point trying to be made, I think it would be better fitted to teach that both men and women are to better stewards of beauty. We are to guard the hearts of one another.
But, while I didn't see eye-to-eye on every issue and while I was a man reading a book written for women, this was a good read. If you are looking to break a bad dating cycle or gain more clarity in dating, seriously read this. Men, I do think there's quite a bit to learn about how our dating habits do have a profound impact as well. Let's be real men.
I received a free copy of this book from Tyndale House Publishers in exchange for my honest review.