"When Narcissism Comes To Church" is an excellent read on the unfortunate reality that the narcissism the church often accuses the world of also exists within the church, usually in the form of a powerful, controlling, and charismatic pastor, staff member, or lay leader. Around 190 pages the author covers many topics on the subject, including:

- Reasons why narcissism is prevalent among people who seek to become more like Christ.

- Key characteristics of narcissism.

- Characteristics of the 9 types of narcissists within the church.

- Many examples of people (pastors, staff, laypeople, etc.) who have been harmed by narcissists within the church.

- 10 characteristics of narcissistic pastors and how they negatively impact others - church staff, members, etc.

- 3 categories of people to keep watch over (yourself, church flock, little ones) according to Acts 20:28.

- Characteristics of a healthy church.

- Practical suggestions for dealing with the different types of narcissists within the church.

The book is very readable, smoothly transitions from chapter to chapter, and pulls no punches in addressing an issue that some within the church try to ignore and refuse to deal with reality. Written from a Christian perspective, the author is not slamming the church, but instead wants to see healing happen within the church. If you are the type of person who refuses to accept the reality that narcissists do not exist within the church and that you do not want to address hard issues, then this book is not for you. Conversely, if you want to either do your part to bring healing to the church and/or want to avoid becoming a narcissist yourself, then this title is highly recommended. Excellent read.

I was given a review copy by IVP in exchange for a fair review and appreciate the opportunity.

To give some context to this review, I'm a pastor who's been in ministry for 15+ years now. Several years ago, I emerged from an 18-month long season of spiritual abuse at the hands of two narcissistic leaders in the Church. Chuck DeGroat and his wisdom through his writings have been an integral part of my healing process. I would not be in ministry today if it were not for him. That's why when I received my copy of this book, I devoured it. There is so much wisdom here that I wish I could put into the hands of every pastor, seminary student, and elder board/leadership council.

Two big things stand out to me. First, understanding the telltale signs of narcissistic abuse helps you realize that you're not crazy. There's no way to adequately describe the devastating effects of emotional and spiritual abuse in the church coupled with believing it's all your fault. Chuck's forceful yet compassionate description of narcissistic leaders and narcissistic systems will help people name, confront, and escape this abuse much earlier and hopefully limit the damage to themselves and those around them. Especially helpful here is Chuck's discussion of how narcissism shows up differently in each of the 9 enneagram types.

Second, Chuck paints a beautiful picture of the healing journey after narcissistic abuse. Using the image of the Exodus journey from Egypt, he demonstrates that healing and sometimes even restoration is possible; though it requires a significant investment of time, energy, attention, and compassion. With loads of God's grace and wise companions in the form of therapists and spiritual directors, healing is possible for those who have experienced abuse and, sometimes, even for narcissists themselves.

This book deserves a wide reading and you will not be disappointed with the investment of time you make in reading this book!

As a young Christian in college, I survived a brutal, three-year church split that fractured our church into four fragments. I had to decide whether Christianity was a crock and I should discard it, or if something had gone terribly wrong along the way in this church. I was driven to make sense of the horrific treatment I had seen and the resulting confusion and emotional trauma I had experienced:

* How supposedly Bible-believing Christians could do such cruel things to one another.

* Whether the leaders taught some right things, but lived them in a wrong way.

* There were no justifications for what happened - but were there other explanations.

There were NO books on spiritual abuse recovery back in the 1970s. When Narcissism Comes To Church by Chuck DeGroat is the book I wish I had had, to help me understand how I had been susceptible to getting sucked into such a toxic system in the first place, how to interpret the crazy-making tactics of the abusive pastor and his band of enablers who took over the church, how to heal, and how to support the few friends I had left who had gotten mixed up in that mess.

Like many abuse survivors, I did not want what happened to me to happen to others. So, I was always watching for resources on any and all forms of abuse. Eventually I felt led to find or develop ministry resources myself. Since 2007, I have invested myself in research writing on subjects related to abusive individuals and the institutions they create or co-opt, recovery and ongoing resilience for survivors, and practical solutions for intervening in and preventing systemic abuse.

On that basis, I can say with confidence that When Narcissism Comes To Church serves as a centerpiece resource for: (1) abuse survivors and their personal support and advocacy networks, (2) personal equippers and social change agents (counselors, teachers, writers, activists, social entrepreneurs), and (3) leaders in established churches, plants, and non-profits.

Chuck DeGroat - who has experience and expertise in all three of these groups himself - integrates principles, practices, and personal stories in a masterful way that moves us forward, yet always using personable and accessible language. He introduces a comprehensive range of essential concept frameworks and solution skills that these audiences likely already know they need. He also embeds clues to advanced principles and practices they might not otherwise realize for years that they require in order to go deeper.

I am thankful for the compassion and wisdom Chuck DeGroat puts on every page. He has gifted us with a guidebook to personal healing from emotional and spiritual abuse. But his book also gives all parties affected a common vocabulary for the challenging conversations we must be having about individual recovery and support, and institutional rehabilitation and health. This is why, in a time of reckoning on abuse in our congregations and communities, I believe When Narcissism Comes To Church is destined to become a timeless, standard resource.

Chuck Degroat's book, When Narcissism Comes To Church, exposes something that has been hidden for a long time. Many within the church have experience with abusive and Narcissistic leaders and this book provides the vocabulary for sharing those experiences. Furthermore, Chuck makes this book personal through his engagement with the Enneagram, showing how Narcissism shows up in different ways. It's not his precision with defining Narcissism nor his engagement with the Enneagram that makes his book so powerful. This book is powerful because Chuck presents the reader with the hope of healing and transformation. Chuck writes, "In the end, the hope of transformation is anchored in the presence of a God who is utterly familiar with all the dark and light within us - and is not afraid of it." This provides me with the hope that there is hope for personal transformation and there is hope for the church. I am grateful for Chuck's work and know that it will bless the church.

While I appreciate this author's work on narcissism in the church context, I am not fond of his connections to the enneagram. The enneagram is hogwash and possibly heresy. I was introduced to the enneagram in a seminary class. It is dangerous stuff. Beware. Bible-believing Christians should beware of the enneagram and its New Age and deceptive content. There is nothing scientific about the enneagram like other personality tests or sorters. It's origins lie outside the Bible as well as the Christian tradition.

The material on narcissism is very good. Lots of insight, but not a homerun for someone who is a conservative Christian who holds to the Bible. Author admits he is an egalitarian (someone who advocates for women in ordained preaching leadership ministry) and seems to imply that complementarians may be more narcissistic. Also makes a point about a man desiring a daily sexual relationship with his wife as if that were a negative thing. My experience as a pastor is that this is actually very common among young husbands. This is probably something best left out of the book, but an important issue for counselors and pastors to address when it is a conflict for couples. Also uses an illustration poking fun of President Trump from the get-go: that the mainstream media says he is a narcissist. I read the Kindle version from Amazon because it was on backorder from Christianbook.com. Blessings!