The Way of Letting Go: One Woman's Walk Toward Forgiveness
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The Way of Letting Go: One Woman's Walk Toward Forgiveness

Zondervan / 2017 / Paperback

In Stock
Stock No: WW346579


Product Description

Few know how to survive the icy waters of grief better than Wilma Derksen. On one random Friday in 1984, her thirteen-year-old daughter, Candace, went missing. Seven weeks later, her body was found in a shed. Left to die in the plunging temperatures of Winnipeg's first cold front that year.

Wilma's world collapsed. Her marriage, her faith, her sanity, all hung the balance in the weeks and months that followed. It was only when she stopped hiding her grief and bravely faced her experience that she began to heal. In The Way of Letting Go, Wilma shares fifteen "Letting Go" statements--including Letting Go of the Old Me, Letting Go of Guilt, and Letting Go of My Need to Know. In these pages, Wilma shows you how, with God's help, she overcame her broken heart, and replaced fear with forgiveness. You can do the same.

Product Information

Format: Paperback
Number of Pages: 224
Vendor: Zondervan
Publication Date: 2017
Dimensions: 8.0 X 5.3 (inches)
ISBN: 0310346576
ISBN-13: 9780310346579

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Publisher's Description

Maybe it was the sting of remarks from a relative or friend. Maybe a miscarriage ended your hopes for a family. For all of your heartbreaks, maybe you wished there was someone to help you through. For Wilma Derksen, letting go of the 15 misconceptions about grief led her back to hope. In this book she tells how you can do the same.

Wilma’s world collapsed when her teenage daughter, Candace, was taken hostage and murdered. Wilma now shares her choices to "let go" of heartbreak, which gave her the courage to navigate through the dark waters of sorrow. Like Wilma, maybe your heartbreak forced you to retreat from happy expectations, of believing that life is fair, of finding closure for every circumstance. She encourages patiently: let go of the happy ending, let go of perfect justice, let go of fear, and let go of closure. Wilma's wisdom will help you overcome your broken heart, and her advice will enable you to break free of pain to live a life of true joy.

Author Bio

Wilma Derksen is an international speaker and consultant on victimization and criminal justice. She has told her story and facilitated support groups of survivors of homicide, organized dialogues between victims and inmates in prison, conducted trainings, given lectures, participated in panel discussions, presented her insights to the justice system, and addressed victims’ needs at restorative justice conferences throughout the United States and Canada.

 

 

 

Editorial Reviews

With this book Wilma Derksen has found a way to redeem the seemingly irredeemable. After living through a parent’s worst nightmare, she devoted herself to the hard work of forgiveness, dissecting each stage with a surgeon’s skill. The practical wisdom that has emerged could only come from someone who strained to forgive the unforgivable---and somehow succeeded. What she learned along the way brings hope to all of us who struggle with this most difficult, yet most necessary task.
I have followed Wilma’s journey for years. It has been incredibly difficult, incredibly moving, and her insights incredibly profound. She has much to teach us all.
In The Way of Letting Go Wilma Derksen demonstrates how the healing process is to pass from the narrative of trauma as overwhelming grief into the narrative of trauma as an experience of deep and meaningful significance. Bringing together all her experience and learning following the agony of her daughter’s murder, here over thirty years later Derksen is able to give voice to a humanity born out of suffering. There are few who have given as much thought to the transformative power of forgiveness---she has defined, refined, probed, and reevaluated one of the most difficult, complex, but never more relevant forces in the world today.
Wilma Derksen’s powerful book highlights a profound paradox---to achieve some degree of control over one’s life and emotions in the face of grief and trauma, one has to do the opposite---let go of control.
The answer is love and compassion for all of humanity. When the Nazarene said that we should forgive seventy times seven, he was telling us that forgiveness should be a habit, a way of life. Forgiveness is not for the person who has wronged us; it is for us---it sets us free. Wilma’s story is proof of this.

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  1. gcw1
    York, PA
    Age: Over 65
    Gender: male
    4 Stars Out Of 5
    Forgiving
    May 15, 2017
    gcw1
    York, PA
    Age: Over 65
    Gender: male
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 4
    THE WAY OF LETTING GO

    One Womans Walk Toward Forgiveness

    By Wilma Derksen

    The forgiveness this book deals with is forgiveness of losing a child in a tragedy. This is very hard for anyone to deal with. The author and the writer of the introduction give examples of how different people handle a loss of this type. Some want to get revenge, some never let go of what took place. The author shares what she and her husband went through when their daughter went missing and for seven weeks. When they got the news of their daughters body being found, they had to come to grips with the truth that their daughter was not coming home, their hope was gone. She shares how they handled that news and how they worked on going on with life. She offers ways of letting go of the fear, grief, their guilt and blame as well as rage along with many other things. She shares all emotions that she and her husband went through and how they worked on forgiving. In the last chapter, chapter 23, of the book she explains what forgiveness.

    The author has traveled to different areas to share her story with others who need comfort from being victimized and need help in dealing with their own tragedies.

    I received this book free from the publisher through the BookLook Bloggersbook review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commissions 16 CFR, Part 255
  2. incitefaith
    Georgia
    Age: 25-34
    Gender: female
    3 Stars Out Of 5
    The Way of Letting Go by Wilma Derkson [Book Review]
    April 15, 2017
    incitefaith
    Georgia
    Age: 25-34
    Gender: female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 3
    The Way of Letting Go by Wilma Derksen was a timely read. I feel like most of my life has been spent learning to let go. While I'll never understand the pain of losing a family member to unspeakable tragedy, I understand what it means to lose someone I love.

    Forgiveness is a way of life, and with this book, Wilma shows you how to start.

    The time between letting go and learning to forgive is a never ending process. Forgiveness isn't a one time thing and then you're free; forgiveness is a lifetime of learning to love other people, love those who hurt you, and ultimately, yourself.

    This wasn't my favorite book of the year so far, mainly because it was hard to connect with her tragedy and my heart break. It felt silly at times to compare the two. But regardless, I believe any one who struggles with forgiveness or is still in the process of learning to forgive can relate to this book.

    Forgiveness is a moment by moment decision to set the offender free.

    If you're in a season of life where forgiveness is difficult, this book will help.

    I received this book free from the publisher through the BookLook Bloggers book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commissions 16 CFR, Part 255 : Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.

  3. Janet
    Belton, TX
    Age: 45-54
    Gender: Female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    How to Live the Virtue of Forgiveness
    April 7, 2017
    Janet
    Belton, TX
    Age: 45-54
    Gender: Female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    In her new book, The Way of Letting Go, author Wilma Derksen shares the lessons in forgiveness that she learned as she struggled to forgive her daughters killer. The book is mostly memoir as Derkson tells the part of her story relevant to the lesson, then summarizes with a simple statement proclaiming the particular lesson she had to learn through it. Most chapters also have a related lesson from the teachings of Jesus, Who is presented in this book as the Nazarene. Derksens experiences in learning to forgive span more than twenty years.

    Though the pain Derksen experienced was horrific, she has presented her lessons in such a way as to make the relevant for anyone who has experienced any kind of trauma or pain, for anyone who struggles to forgive. I love that Derksen teaches her readers to live forgiveness. In Chapter 23, she writes, Because the world is brokenand it is broken in so many waysforgiveness is a virtue. We not only forgive, but we also need to be forgiving. It should be part of our character. The lessons in this book will help readers learn how to let Gods Spirit make forgiveness a growing virtue in their lives.

    I thank Zondervan for sending me a complimentary copy of this book, so that I could share my thoughts about it with you. I highly recommend this read.
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