I'm Happy for You (Sort Of...Not Really): Finding Contentment in a Culture of Comparison  -     By: Kay Wills Wyma
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I'm Happy for You (Sort Of...Not Really): Finding Contentment in a Culture of Comparison

WaterBrook / 2015 / Paperback

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Product Description

In our over-scheduled, ultra-competitive culture of social media one-upmanship, a lot of moms are starting to burn out. Could a cultural "comparison trap"---and the fear of missing out---be stealing joy and contentment from our offline lives? Find courage to re-evaluate today's skewed perspective of success as measured by "likes" and retweets---and embrace a simpler existence! 240 pages, softcover from Waterbrook.

Product Information

Format: Paperback
Number of Pages: 240
Vendor: WaterBrook
Publication Date: 2015
Dimensions: 8.00 X 5.19 (inches)
ISBN: 1601425953
ISBN-13: 9781601425959

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Publisher's Description

Is comparison living hijacking your life?

Do you find yourself measuring your value against your friend’s house, body, marriage, resume, paycheck, organic garden, or Pinterest-worthy holiday décor, and coming up lacking? Do your college roommate’s Instagram snapshots bear little resemblance to the scene at your house this morning?

Excessive comparison and competition sap our energy and steal our joy. Our friends become our audience and judges, and our kids become part of our brand. Add social media’s constant invitation to post and peruse, and it’s no wonder that we’re left exhausted, discontent, and lonely. Thankfully, there is another way!

With  refreshing candor and humor, Kay Wyma shares her experiences with comparison living and offers readers the simple remedies that helped her and her family reboot their perspective and discover freedom, authenticity, and joy.

Author Bio

Kay Wills Wyma is a blogger, mother of five, and the author of Cleaning House. She has appeared on The TODAY Show, CNN, Glenn Beck, The New York Times, Focus on the Family, and other media outlets. Before becoming a stay-at-home mom, she held positions at the White House, the Staubach Company, and Bank of America. Kay lives in the Dallas area with her husband, Jon, and their family.

Editorial Reviews

Praise for
I’m Happy for You (Sort of…Not Really)

"Kay Wills Wyma once again champions a much-needed culture shift—with heartfelt insight she challenges us to choose contentment over comparison. I’m Happy for You gently exposes the growing obsession with self-promotion and one-upmanship that’s wearing us all out and, thankfully, offers wise solutions."
—Tracey Eyster, Founder of FamilyLife’s MomLifeToday.com; author of Be the Mom and Beautiful Mess

"Kay Wills Wyma captured my attention with her belly-laughing good storytelling steeped in reality as she tackled a question that’s long overdue for an honest answer: What should we do about this comparison trap we find ourselves falling into daily? When comparison steals contentment, it’s a problem that demands a solution. Kay gives it to us in a way that is easy on the heart and good for the soul."
—Elisa Pulliam, author and life coach

"Who knew comparison was so prevalent and destructive? Awakening to this alone is worth the time invested in reading this honest and sometimes raw literary gem. Comparison’s thievery of joy is arrested by the ’just let it go’ practicality Kay offers so transparently and humorously. It might just put you on the path toward contentment and gratitude, a road less traveled."
—Robin Pou, executive coach and attorney mediator; coauthor of Performance Intelligence at Work

"Kay Wyma has managed to address what we’re all dealing with on a daily basis—the ability to instantly compare our life to someone else’s with just a mere look at our phone. There we can see all the ways we are failing to be the best mom, the best wife, the best friend…and the list goes on. In the pages of I’m Happy for You, Kay offers insight into why we do this and how we can stop the cycle. If you’re looking to live a life of contentment and authenticity and to be okay when your kid is the C student and not the valedictorian, you’ll find comfort and realistic solutions in the pages of this book."

—Melanie Shankle, New York Times best-selling author of Sparkly Green Earrings
"I’m Happy for You is honest and funny, while tackling a serious problem that is stealing our joy: comparison. Kay creatively uses stories and personal confession to reveal the pitfalls of comparing, while offering a solid ladder—built on godly wisdom—to help us climb out of that pit. I wish I could pass this book on to every woman who has worn herself out trying to achieve unrealistic standards. There’s freedom on these pages."
—Jennifer Dukes Lee, author of Love Idol

"Kay Wyma hit a home run on the Focus on the Family radio program when she talked about ways moms can combat the entitlement mentality in their kids. In her new book, she scores another hit with an insightful discussion of the pitfalls of comparing your life to others, especially through social media. Her advice is timely and relevant."
—Jim Daly, president of Focus on the Family

"Victims of comparison drive-bys litter the Internet. There are virtual warehouses of new ways to covet your neighbor’s home, decorating skills, summer vacation plans, or Pinterest-perfect kids’ birthday parties. In this paralyzing culture of obsessive comparisons, this book is the detox we all need. With a sense of humor and an unrelenting honesty, Kay walks us through the steps to finding our worth again in the God who never compares us but always only calls us by name."
—Lisa-Jo Baker, community manager for (in)courage; author of Surprised by Motherhood

"There is no joy to be found in comparing ourselves to others. Fortunately, with both cultural relevance and biblical foundation, Kay Wills Wyma accurately defines not only the comparison problem, but offers a solution. I’m Happy for You is a must-read for anyone caught in the comparison trap."
—Joshua Becker, best-selling author of Simplify; founder of Becoming Minimalist

"For years I’ve said ’Comparison is the kiss of death of gratitude.’ Whether we stroll the shopping malls, thumb through catalogs, shop online, or inadvertently compare ourselves to others, we are imperceptibly overwhelmed with longings to be like someone else, to have something else, believing it somehow enhances our identity. The pursuit of bigger, better, newer, and more never stops. With a compelling lilt, Kay Wills Wyma’s pen pulls us along only to expose and confront our comparison battle. From one co-struggler to another, Kay brings us perspective and relief."
—Dr. Michael Easley, former president of Moody Bible Institute; teaching pastor; host of Michael Easley inContext

"Kay Wills Wyma has opened a powerful window on the reality of comparison and how it’s impacting all of us, including vulnerable young lives. With social media, instead of just keeping up with the Joneses, we’re now keeping up with the world. Kay navigates us through the pressures we all face and teaches us how to be genuinely happy for others and deliberate about our current situation and future plans at every stage of life."
—Kathy Ireland, chair/CEO/chief designer at kathy ireland Worldwide

Product Reviews

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  1. NY
    Age: 25-34
    Gender: female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    Awesome Read!
    December 2, 2015
    melz
    NY
    Age: 25-34
    Gender: female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    Have you ever found yourself struggling to stay content when everyone around you seems so perfect? Kay Wills Wyma writes in her new book, Im Happy For You, a topic that have affected all of us at one time or another: comparison. In a world, where we can compare and be compared by just one click of the mouse, unhappiness is never too far away. Ms. Wyma writes from her own experiences of learning how to deal with the comparison-crazed society and shares with us her experiences and also shares the insights she has gained from her children as she has navigated them through their own experiences with comparison.

    One of the golden nuggets of insight that Ms. Wyma shares is how God made us not for isolation but to be in community with one another. I thought this was such an important statement to make because comparison has a tendency to create isolation from others. Ms. Wyma also makes the point that God made us unique for a purpose; to help/make a difference in one anothers lives.

    I thoroughly enjoyed this book. Ms. Wyma writes honestly and is encouraging. I would recommend this book to anyone who struggles with finding contentment or who needs encouragement on their road to contentment.

    Happy Reading!

    Disclosure (in accordance with the FTCs 16 CFR, Part 255: Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising): Many thanks to Propeller Consulting, LLC for providing this prize for the giveaway. Choice of winners and opinions are 100% my own and NOT influenced by monetary compensation. I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post.
  2. Norfolk, NE
    Age: 35-44
    Gender: female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    Fantastic Fabulous Fun
    September 19, 2015
    Shai
    Norfolk, NE
    Age: 35-44
    Gender: female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    You had me at Hellowell actually at the title of the book. Im Happy For You (Sort ofNot Really) by Kay Wills Wyma is AH-MAZE-ING!

    In a world where comparison and competition are epidemicwhere Facebook, Pinterest and Twitter announce to the world the worthiness of each individual, Kay Willis Wyma reminds us that we can stop the craziness. Contentment is possible.

    I absolutely LOVED this book. Did I already say that? Thats ok, its worth repeating. I laughed, nodded my head in agreement (emphatically, much to the surprise of those sitting around me in the pick up lane at school) and gave several hearty AMENS. I could quote the entire book because its just that good but Ill refrain and just tell you that you can and should get your own copy, because its worth it. Ill make it easy for you, heres the link.

    But I digressok now onto some of my favorite quotes and stories in the book

    I laughed so hard when she told about the position she held with Advance in the Office of the Vice President at the White House. In an effort to camouflage the pool where the Vice President would be speaking, she had covered the indoor swimming pool with helium filled, red, white and blue balloons. And balloons popping as the Vice President of the United States steps behind the podium to deliver his speech sound a lot like gunshots. My stomach sank as the Secret Service scrambled and my boss radioed, Whos bright idea was it to put balloons in a pool?! Uhthat would be me.

    The second story was about misconceptions. She writes, What if getting our eyes off our own misconceptions about our bodies could help us recognize opportunities to help others be happier about themselves? She goes on to tell about taking her small children into a sandwich shop where a morbidly obese woman is at the counter ordering her meal. When her five-year old tugs on her skirt and tells her mom Look at that lady over there! her fears come to life. It gets worse when the child asks if she can go talk to the woman. When Kay declines, the child says, I just wanted to tell her how pretty she looks.

    At the end of each chapter, Kay includes a section called Letting Go of Comparison. One of my favorite quotes ended this particular story: Contentment comes when we choose to see the immeasurable, incomparable beauty of each human, including the one in the mirror.

    Using stories from her personal experiences and others throughout the book, Ms. Wyma provides great arguments and instruction for overcoming our cultural Obsessive Comparison Disorder.

    Overall, Im Happy for You (Sort ofNot Really) deserves five out of five stars! I received this book from Blogging for Books for this review.

    https://wordynerdyblog.wordpress.com/2015-book-reviews/im-happy-for-you-sort-of-not-really-by-kay-wills-wyma/
  3. Age: 45-54
    Gender: female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    I'm Happy for You
    July 22, 2015
    Kara
    Age: 45-54
    Gender: female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    Im Happy for You (Sort Of. . . Not Really), by Kay Wills Wyma, focuses on assisting the reader to find contentment in a culture of comparison. Wyma strives to teach readers to remember the phrase, Im happy for you, instead of comparing yourself to those surrounding you. She has worked in the Advance in the Office of the Vice President at the White House, in corporate banking, and is the mother of five, a wife, a sister, and a daughter. She uses her personal experiences to illustrate our need to focus not on the Glimpse, a moment in time, but rather on the whole picture. She includes Youre Not Alone segments from other people reacting to sections of her book with their own stories and opinions, as well as Letting Go of Comparison summarizing each chapter in few sentences.

    I enjoyed this book. The message that we need to stop comparing ourselves with others and be content with the lives that God has given us is clear. Her personal stories were well-placed and sometimes amusing illustrations to drive home this message. I especially liked the honesty and forthright anecdotes showing that her family is not perfect, but human like everyone else.

    This book is a recommended read for anyone attempting to stop comparing and start being content.

    Kara

    I received this book free from the publisher and was not required to write a positive review.
  4. Honea Path, SC
    Age: 45-54
    Gender: female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    Excellent Read!
    July 5, 2015
    muffin
    Honea Path, SC
    Age: 45-54
    Gender: female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    This book was one of the most insightful books I have ever read! Since I have a melancholy personality, I have a strong tendency to view the glass as half empty. Even as a little girl, I had the tendency to compare myself to others, and this followed me on into my adult years. Even when I had my first child, I compared when my child walked to a friend's child! Sometimes this tendency tends to weigh me down in life, and I really feel like I can't enjoy life like I should. Kay Wills Wyma uses real-life illustrations and great quotes to show us how to avoid this trap, and also how to really be happy for someone else.

    The first quote she used that really caught my attention was "Comparison is the thief of joy" (Theodore Roosevelt). Boy, was this eye-opening. How many times do we compare ourselves/family to others and all this does is just rob us of our joy in life. Comparison can really wear us down. It is really not worth it. Another eye opener for me was that God views all of us as special. He doesn't have one favorite. We are all His favorites!

    Kay Wills Wyma also shows us how to truly be happy for others. This is very hard for me, but she opened my eyes to how if we are truly happy for others, this takes the pressure off us to be the best. She gave an example of her teenage daughter and volleyball. She ended up being the setter for her volleyball team. This is not a glorious position because she never makes the actual score. So she doesn't get the claps and cheers. But this girl realized that she was the person who helped the other team members score. They needed her and it felt good to her to be able to help them receive the praises! I was so impressed that a teenager figured this out. It took me 50 years to figure this out!

    I highly recommend this book! I only highlighted a few parts in the book, but there is tons of wisdom and quotes all throughout the book. I have highlighted and posted some of these quotes on my fb page. This is a book I will refer to later on in life.

    I received this book from WaterBrook Multnomah for my honest opinion.

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