Interesting perspective on marriage/reconciliation
June 15, 2012
Bay Area, CA
On some levels this was tough book to read. I don't mean that in a negative way, more in that it made me think a lot. Anyone who has been married would probably relate to some aspects of this story, and for those that aren't, perhaps it would provide some cautionary elements.
Eric & Kyra Yoshida have been together for about 20 years, married for most of that time. They have one grown son, Benji, and used to be madly in love but are now experiencing some serious problems. During their separation, Eric has an affair, Benji is discharged from the military, and Kyra is in a car accident serious enough to cause some memory loss. Conveniently for Eric, who has now decided he wants to reconcile, Kyra doesn't recall their separation and views him in a way she hasn't for quite a while. Although he wants to tell her, he wants her back more and justifies that on some level, being completely honest isn't in her best interests.
There are a lot of layers to this book, and although I would overall be glad to recommend it - Gina Holmes is an excellent writer (loved Crossing Oceans), there were times when reading it was a challenge. Since the main character wasn't extremely likeable to me, I had a hard time rooting for him when I just wanted to give him a good shake. And then kick him in the shins. That said - it's a worthwhile read.
I read, "Crossing Oceans", Gina's 1st book, and enjoyed it very much. When I heard she'd finished her 2nd book I was excited to read it, knowing it would be good. However, it wasn't just good - it was GREAT! Without giving anything away, I want to say the issue of unfaithfulness in marriage is handled delicately and very realistically. The story is told from the husband's point of view and there is not condemnation or justification for him being unfaithful to his marriage vows. I know she has a 3rd book coming out sometime in the next few months and I'm SUPER excited to read it!!!
In "Dry As Rain," Gina Holmes has written a unusual novel detailing the story of one man's "moment of weakness" and the resulting consequences. What I found especially unique was the fact that its written as a first person narrative and from the perspective of the adulterous spouse. While I would not normally gravitate to a book with this as the central plot, I did enjoy the story and the fact that Ms. Holmes was able to make the novel quite realistic and yet also hopeful.
However, coming from Tyndale Publishers, I did expect a more "Christian" or at least Biblically infused book, yet I do think it would still be encouraging to spouses on both sides of adultery.
Dry as Rain by Gina Holmes is her second book. I really liked Crossing Oceans but I enjoyed Dry as Rain even more. Gina has a gift for writing issue driven stories that include wonderful characters. The characters are very human and you like them at times and you dislike them at times. They could be our neighbors, family or even ourselves. Which always makes for an interesting read if not a comfortable one.
Eric and Kyra had something wonderful and they promised each other it was forever. On their way to success they lost each other and the promise they made. When Kyra finds an incriminating email she tells Eric he needs to leave.
When Kyra loses her memory, Eric has to decide if what they had is worth figthing for. With support from a friend and little support from Kyra's sister, he decides it is and goes to work. But when Kyra gets her memory back will she be able to forgive him? Will it still be worth it?
Statictics are showing that the greatest number of divorces are happening in marriages that are 20 - 35 years old. It is happening across the board, in and out of churches. When asked why, infidelity is still listed as number 1, but running a close second is the "we just grew apart" reason. Empty nesters find themselves suddenly having lots of time on their hands and don't know what to do with each other. They have their own lives and nothing in common with their spouse. This can even lead into the first problem.
What makes Dry as Rain so interesting is that it is told from Eric's perspective. He talks a lot about why he did things like earning a living and moving the family into a certain neighborhood and even why he sent and received the email. I thought it was an interesting perspective on the story that usually gets written from the woman's perspective. I am not sure how Gina was able to write this perspective so well, but like I said, it is interesting to get the guy's point of view.
If you haven't had a chance to pick up a book by Gina yet, this is a great place to start.
This is not your typical love story. It's one fraught with the humanity that is so prevalent in a fallen world. Their marriage deadens like the frog who goes from cold to boiling water without realizing he's being cooked. Much like many marriages around us. Real.
And then, Eric, the main character, discovers he has done the thing he never believed he was capable of. But isn't that the insidious nature of sin? We are most vulnerable to that which we believe we are not.
Now, how to heal what has been broken. Eric is given an opportunity when his wife loses the portion of her memory where the marriage had been crumbling. Unfortunately, Eric takes too long to see and own the effects of his woundings, and how God would have him heal them, so rather than build the marriage on truth, he selfishly takes advantage of the advice the doctor gave him.
Will he see what's wrong before it's too late? Can he work to build back what he's destroyed? You'll have to read to find out.
Gina Holmes is a very talented writer. I am instantly drawn to her characters and their story and hope their lives will turn out well. They are strong and vulnerable, good and bad, spiritual and selfish. Human. Her writing made it easy to enter into the world of this man struggling to heal the effects of his own wrongs. And though the reader may not always agree with his choices, he or she has a better understanding of why he made them. A reminder of the reason God tells us not to judge.
What I love about this story is that it is very real. The characters are flawed and desperately in need of a Savior, even when they think they already have Him in their hip pocket. Most troubled marriages develop from a lifetime of cracks and often require a lifetime of spackle. And sometimes, when the hole is too big, one needs to build from scratch.
And yet, it can be done! My only wish in reading this book is that I could have lingered a little longer in the real rebuilding of the relationship. It was beautiful. As God's healing always is. It just takes truth, work, and sometimes the hands of time.