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In Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart, Jim and Lynne Jackson teach four powerful principles for discipline that shape both behavior and your kids' hearts. Learn to communicate - even when your kids are at their worst - that they are safe with you, loved no matter what, capable of wise choices, and responsible to make right the things they've done wrong. As you impart these messages, you'll create strong relationships, build lasting wisdom and character, and bring God's grace to life in your home.
|Format: DRM Protected ePub|
Vendor: Bethany House
Publication Date: 2016
Did you know that the way we deal (or don't deal) with our kids' misbehavior shapes their beliefs about themselves, the world, and God? Therefore it's vital to connect with their hearts--not just their minds--amid the daily behavior battles.
With warmth and grace, Jim and Lynne Jackson, founders of Connected Families, offer four tried-and-true keys to handling any behavioral issues with love, truth, and authority. You will learn practical ways to communicate messages of grace and truth, how to discipline in a way that motivates your child, and how to keep your relationship strong, not antagonistic. Discipline is more than just a short-term attempt to modify your child's actions--it's a long-term investment to help them build faith, wisdom, and character for life. When you discover a better path to discipline, you'll find a more well-behaved--and well-believed--kid.
Rhonda Nash-hallMadison Heights VAAge: 45-54Gender: female4 Stars Out Of 5good parenting resourceMay 17, 2017Rhonda Nash-hallMadison Heights VAAge: 45-54Gender: femaleQuality: 4Value: 4Meets Expectations: 4It would definitely have been useful if this had been available when I was raising my three daughters, but I wanted to read it to be a better grandparent to the precious little ones God has blessed me with. I feel that I can also be a resource to my stressed out daughters and stepchildren as they seek to raise their children with Christian principles. The authors use scripture references to support the principles they address. They encourage an approach to parenting that is sure to reach the soul of their children and be a balm to innocent little ones entrusted to their care by God. Listening with love is a large part of the discipline plan they present in the pages of this book. I would recommend this book to parents, grandparents, and those foster parents and others who are raising children. I did feel that some of the book's discipline techniques could have been explained with fewer words. Stressed out parents do not have much free time for reading.
I give this book a 4 star rating. I felt some principles could have been discussed in a shorty manner.
I received a copy of this book from netgalley and Bethany House Publishers.
Brianna5 Stars Out Of 5Review: Discipline that Connects with Your Child's HeartOctober 29, 2016BriannaQuality: 5Value: 5Meets Expectations: 5It may be a bit unusual for someone without children to review a book about raising and disciplining children. However, I enjoy reading parenting books and Discipline that Connects with Your Childs Heart was no exception! I know that the information is useful for working with children in extended family, church, or ministry settings, too.
In Discipline that Connects with Your Childs Heart, Jim and Lynne Jackson cowrite to present the Discipline that Connects model. The model is based on four principles that are crucial for meaningful, long-term success in child-rearing. The principles are to assure your child that he or she is safe, loved, capable and responsible.
The Jacksons acknowledge that sometimes the principles and resulting recommendations seem far-fetched or unlikely to be successful. However, they incorporate stories that show the success of these principles and approaches when practiced with intention and commitment. They also include reflection questions, and family activities throughout the book which help parents and children to practice each principle.
Although I do not have children now, I learned several things from Discipline that Connects with Your Childs Heart and I am sure that I will read it again, if not several times, in years to come. I highly recommend Discipline that Connects with Your Childs Heart to anyone who works or lives with children.
Disclaimer: I received a free copy of this book from the publisher in order to write an honest, unbiased review. The opinions I have expressed are my own.
Kendra5 Stars Out Of 5good resource for parentsOctober 11, 2016KendraQuality: 5Value: 5Meets Expectations: 5In this book, Jim and Lynne Jackson, founders of Connected Families, teach four principles for discipline that connects with the hearts of your children--you are safe with me, you are loved no matter what, you are capable of making wise choices, and you are responsible to make things right. Moving away from authoritarian discipline, these principles focus on empathy, gentle communication, and natural consequences. This is really a book about the parent--rather than a "how to change your child" focus, it deals primarily on how to change yourself in order to connect better with your children, particularly in times of discipline. The first four sections of the book teach each principle in several chapters each. A three-section Appendix applies the four principles to fifteen specific challenges--everything from messes, screen time, meals and bedtime to whining, defiance, tantrums and sibling conflict.
Here's a brief quote from the book that shows the principles in action:
"Jordan, get your shoes on. It's time to go!"
"No, Mommy! I'm making a truck. I don't want to go."
Lynette looks at her son with a hint of a smile and says, "It's difficult to obey sometimes, isn't it. God sure made you both creative and persistent."
She pauses to pray silently, Lord, how will you use these gifts in him?
Then she makes this offer: "Hey, before we get your shoes, show me this cool thing you're working on."
Mommy feels safe to him; eager to please, Jordan proudly displays his truck.
"That's impressive! I love the huge wheels and the extra light on top. Know what? You can set it up here on the table so you'll remember to finish it later. Do you want to wear sneakers or sandals?"
[Then if Jordan would continue to be defiant, natural consequences would be given, such as practicing a better response, losing the privilege of playing with the toy, and/or doing an extra chore for his mother to "pay back" the time she lost in dealing with his defiance.]
One thing I appreciate about this book is the thoughtful, slow approach to discipline, and also the challenge to make sure I am being loving and considerate in my requests of my children. A simple example is my tendency to pluck my one-year old out of whatever he's doing with no warning and then expect him to "talk nicely" to mommy instead of pitch a fit. Another area where I need improvement is increasing the proportion of affirmation and positive direction to correction and negative commands. Finally, an emphasis in this book was teaching our children that they are responsible for their choices and the consequences of those choices, a lost (but very important) reality for many kids these days.
I have three preschoolers and it did seem like this discipline method relies heavily on discussion, brainstorming, and other conversation-based skills that my kids are not able to process yet.There is only a brief half-page or so about spanking, which implies that it is not usually helpful. My opinion is that with the youngest children, an immediate consequence such as a snip on the fingers or a godly spanking is most effective. Then as children mature, methods like the one in this book become more and more useful and replace the "pain-oriented" discipline.
There is no end to books on parenting and discipline, but all in all, I think this is a good one, particularly for the parent who tends toward anger and harshness, or for parents with older children (ages 5 and up). It would also be a good resource for foster parents or people working with kids who have emotional and/or sensory challenges that require extra insight and care.
I received a copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for this review.
Deuce SkunksSpringfield, MOAge: 25-34Gender: Female5 Stars Out Of 5Heartfelt Discipline That Helps Parents Bond With Their ChildrenSeptember 28, 2016Deuce SkunksSpringfield, MOAge: 25-34Gender: FemaleQuality: 5Value: 5Meets Expectations: 5Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart by Jim & Lynne Jackson is a very refreshing dose of sanity in what has become the sheer chaos of raising four kids (8-12). This book focuses on teaching the Discipline That Connects approach to parenting. It shows you step-by-step how to build a relationship with your kids based on the following biblically-based messages: you are safe with me (foundation), you are loved no matter what (Connect), you are called and capable (Coach), and you are responsible for your actions (Correct). These form a rough pyramid with the largest emphasis being on the foundation (safety), and the smallest portion or peak being the correction (responsibility).
This book is not about quick fixes or easy answers. It also does not start by trying to "fix" problems with your child. Instead, it presents common scenarios and typical outcomes within a family where the parents are stressed, exhausted, overwhelmed, or simply at a loss and feel they've tried everything.Between my own childhood anddealing with my four kids over the last 12 years, there wasn't a single scenario in the bookthat I couldn't relate to in one form or fashion. Yes, I knew that what I was doing wasn't working. Yes, I'd get upset and caught up in the moment and say things I would regret or feel shameful/guilty about later. Yes, I had read countless parenting books and tried every idea I could come across in an attempt to regain "control" of an out-of-control child... Yes, I needed a new approach. And this is it!
This book focuses and calming yourself first and foremost, so you can approach your kids rationally in make them feel safe around you, even while being punished. If you've ever had a child shrink in fear because you were upset, then you should be able to recognize the need here. It then walks you through ways to modify your own behaviors that you know feel wrong but you just don't see a way around when you're caught up in the moment. There is hope. This book demonstrates how to show unconditional love while disciplining, how to involve your child in the problem-solving process so they learn to become responsible, and even how to pick up the pieces and get a "do over" when you mess up. Because you will mess up, just like they will. Over and over again, because we're all still learning and trying to get this right. The important thing isn't the getting it right part, it's the loving and forgiving and trying to do better next time.
The real eye openers came for me in chapter 6 when they're listing common problem areas and suggestions for how to be a better parent when you're not at your best, and also at one point when they explain that compliance is not obedience. The first 2/3 of this book are basically a how-to, with lots and lots of real life examples to help pull you through. It's the equivalent of actually being present for a weekend seminar on how to be a better parent and overall communicator. The last 1/3 of the book is appendixes that list even more specific problems and creative solutions for how to help your children grow in your love in order to make better choices.
This book is very highly recommended to any parent that is having problems dealing with the day to day messes of raising kids. Unlike most books that focus on younger children, you could easilypick this up and get a "do over" even if your kids are teenagers. It also addresses harder issues such as stealing, habituallying, and hitting.
As soon as I finished this book, my two oldest were fighting and I took it as an opportunity to test the method I'd just learned. Within five minutes, there were sincere apologies, heart-felt communication and legitimate plans to try to do better next time. This was the largest impact of any parenting concept in years! 5/5 stars.
*Disclaimer: I received this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.*