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Publication Date: 2013
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In True Love Dates, Debra Fileta encourages singles not to kiss dating goodbye but instead to experience a season of dating as a way to find real love. Through reading powerful, real-life stories (including the authors personal journey) and gaining insights from Filetas experience as a professional counselor, readers will discover that it is possible to find true love through dating.
Christians are looking for answers to finding true love. They are disillusioned with the church that has provided little practical application in the area of love and relationships. Theyve been bombarded by Christian books that shun dating, idolize courting, fixate on spirituality, and in the end offer little real relationship help.
True Love Dates provides honest help for dating by guiding readers into vital relationship essentials for finding true love. Debra is a young, professional Christian counselor, and True Love Dates offer sound advice grounded in Christian spirituality. It delivers insight, direction, and counsel when it comes to entering the world of dating and learning to do it right the first time around. Drawing on the stories and struggles of hundreds of young men and women who have pursued finding true love, Fileta helps readers bypass unnecessary pain while focusing on the things that really matter in the world of dating.
Signer4ChristAge: 18-24Gender: female5 Stars Out Of 5I highly recommend this bookFebruary 21, 2014Signer4ChristAge: 18-24Gender: femaleQuality: 5Value: 5Meets Expectations: 5I would recommend to book to everyone, and I have. This is a revolutionary book for someone such as myself who has grown up in the culture where I have been taught that dating is not an appropriate way of life. I had unhealthy expectations for how I was to live, and it has hindered my relationships. This book has changed that. It has restructured the way that I live my own life, and how I interact with others. This book covers three types of dating- inward, outward, and upward. It sets a great baseline for healthy relationships in all aspects of life, from friendships to a believer's relationship with God.
In a world with mixed messages, this book works hard to establish healthy standards and expectations. The author has given a solid Christian foundation, using Scripture to address many issues that are frequently skirted around in church.
As a counseling student, I got so much from this book that I will apply in my professional life. It is a must read for men and women who are single or dating.
Jaclyn LeichelleClinton Township, MIAge: 18-24Gender: female5 Stars Out Of 5Excellent BookJanuary 25, 2014Jaclyn LeichelleClinton Township, MIAge: 18-24Gender: femaleQuality: 4Value: 5Meets Expectations: 5This is an excellent book, letting one not only get a hold of what to look for in a partner, but also how to get to know who you are inside. I would recommend this book to anyone. Already lending it out to friends, single and in relationships!!
StaceyBakersfield, CAAge: 25-34Gender: female3 Stars Out Of 5Helpful to some...January 11, 2014StaceyBakersfield, CAAge: 25-34Gender: femaleQuality: 2Value: 2Meets Expectations: 1Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor who specializes in dating, marriage, and relationship issues. The center of this book is on pursuing dating, but with its focus on developing healthy relationships. In its description, the author "encourages singles not to "kiss dating goodbye" and instead experience a season of dating as a way to find real love." For the bulk of the book, the core focus is on dating and developing a healthy relationship with boundaries. Each chapter is filled with experiences that the author and those she have met have experienced in their lives, as they pursued relationships.
I loved the emphasis of finding out who we, ourselves, are through dating ourselves. The idea behind dating oneself is to get to know who we really are, find out what we want (future; spouse's characteristics; goals), and catching a glimpse of the vision God has placed on our hearts for our lives. However, I wish more emphasis was put into our (individual) relationship with God. "Dating Upward" is a section focused on our relationship with God. This section was saved for later in the book, where it seemed to revolve around the spouse at some points more than others. It is then in chapter 10 where Debra boldly talks about finding a spouse has become the main purpose of many young adults. She begins to delve into the problem with this. While this is true that many search for spouse as though they are their source of purpose, I wish the book better reflected this and was used as an instrument to draw others to Christ in the waiting period and being strengthened in Him. It would of changed the book radically to speak to individuals like me who are single and not dating. I understand this book was meant to go a different direction. I believe the better book would of centered around core advice, not others' experiences.
I wish the book was more Scripture centered, and had more an approach of leaning us closer to Christ--not just in practical approach, but in spirit and mind also. While I did not thoroughly enjoy this book, I still found meaningful points in some of the chapters and advice found in section 4 entitled "Ask The Counselor".
I review for BookSneezeÃÂ®
IolaNew ZealandAge: 45-54Gender: female5 Stars Out Of 5Not just for singlesDecember 20, 2013IolaNew ZealandAge: 45-54Gender: femaleQuality: 5Value: 5Meets Expectations: 5I picked up this book for review after reading an interesting article by the author in Relevant magazine. I'm not a singleton looking for love. In fact, I'm about to celebrate my twentieth wedding anniversary.
But my marital status doesn't matter. Although True Love Dates is aimed at singles, I though the advice was relevant for all ages, for anyone who is looking to improve their relationship with a date, fiancÃÂ© or spouseÃ¢â¬âor even their child. I had a vision for my life in my teens, but marriage and children have taken over. I know who I am, but do I know who I want to be when I no longer have children at home? And do I know who God wants me to be, now and in the future?
The book is in four main sections. The first three look at what Fileta sees as the three main stages of dating: inward, outward and upward.
The first section focuses on who I am, where I come from (and how that can impact relationships), and what I want out of life. As she says:
Ã¢â¬ËIn order to proclaim "I do," one has to know and understand "I."'
The second section focuses on what to look for in a potential partner (with a focus on the major aspects of character, rather than the external characteristics of looks and money), while the third section focuses on our relationship with God:
"If you desire marriage, seek God. If you desire singleness, seek God. In the end, if you entrust your heart to him, God will use your desires to lead you in the right direction."
The final section of the book is answers to the questions she hears most frequently in her counselling practice. (I especially liked her comments on Ã¢â¬Ëbiblical dating': that in Bible times, a woman's spouse was pretty much chosen by her parents, who then paid the groom a dowry consisting of family treasures and a donkey or two. Should we return to Ã¢â¬Ëbiblical dating'? I think not.)
I like the fact that Fileta is writing from the point of view of a Christian who lives in the real world. I've read Christian self-help books in the past that have been off-putting because the author has written from a Christian bubble where everything is rosy and no one ever has an unkind or impure thought. I find those books impossible to relate to (or recommend), as I live in a world full of sin where I constantly make mistakes (and so do those around me). It was refreshing to see dating examined in a way that is relevant and relatable. Recommended.
Thanks to Zondervan and NetGalley for providing a free ebook for review.
CreazianVAAge: 18-24Gender: female5 Stars Out Of 5Best Dating Book!September 19, 2013CreazianVAAge: 18-24Gender: femaleQuality: 5Value: 5Meets Expectations: 5Young new voice, Debra Fileta, brings a wealth of knowledge and experience from her counseling practice to equip singles with sound dating advice.
In True Love Dates, Debra Fileta encourages singles not to "kiss dating goodbye" but instead to experience a season of dating as a way to find real love. Through reading powerful, real-life stories (including the author's personal journey) and gaining insights from Fileta's experience as a professional counselor, Christians searching for answers to finding true love need look no further.
True Love Dates provides honest help for dating by guiding readers through the relationship essentials that lead to healthy couplesÃ¢â¬âand true love. Debra is a young, professional Christian counselor, and True Love Dates offer sound advice grounded in Christian spirituality. It delivers insight, direction, and counsel when it comes to entering the world of dating and learning to do it right the first time around. Drawing on the stories and struggles of hundreds of young men and women who have pursued finding true love, Fileta helps readers bypass unnecessary pain while focusing on the things that really matter in the world of dating.
I loved this book because it was different from "I kissed dating goodbye." I like how it talks about the expereince of dating to find true love. I have a lot of friends who date their spouses less than a year and then get married. I always wondered if their relationship would last, seeing how they got married young.
I guess I'll find out through Facebook or word of mouth if they get divorced early. But I love how this book guides readers through the stages of healthy couples and advises on relationship essentials.