Compassion Without Compromise: How the Gospel Frees Us to Love Our Gay Friends Without Losing the Truth - eBook  -     By: Adam T. Barr, Ron Citlau
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Compassion Without Compromise: How the Gospel Frees Us to Love Our Gay Friends Without Losing the Truth - eBook

Bethany House / 2014 / ePub

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Product Information

Format: DRM Protected ePub
Vendor: Bethany House
Publication Date: 2014
ISBN: 9781441264763
ISBN-13: 9781441264763

Publisher's Description

Loving, Biblical Answers on Homosexuality

In the next year at least one of these things will happen in your life:
• A family member will come out of the closet and expect you to be okay with it.
• Your elementary-age child's curriculum will discuss LGBT families.
• Your company will talk about building a tolerant workplace for LGBT co-workers.
• Your college-age child will tell you your view on homosexuality is bigoted.

Are you ready?

In their role as pastors, Adam Barr and Ron Citlau have seen how this issue can tear apart families, friendships, and even churches. In this book they combine biblical answers with practical, real-world advice on how to think about and discuss this issue with those you care about. They also tell the story of Ron's personal journey from same-sex attraction and sexual brokenness to healing.

Truth does not preclude kindness--and a good dose of humility is necessary to love our neighbors. With sensitivity and winsomeness, this book will offer an honest but inviting message to readers: We are all in need of the healing that can only come from the truth of the gospel.

Author Bio

Adam T. Barr (MDiv, Western Theological Seminary, ThM, Trinity Evangelical Divinity School) serves as senior pastor at Peace Church in Grand Rapids, Michigan. He is the president and founder of Borderlands, a worldview ministry, and serves on the board of RCA Integrity, a renewal movement in the Reformed Church in America. Adam lives with his wife, Jennifer, and four sons in Middleville, Michigan.

Ron Citlau
(MDiv, Western Theological Seminary) is the lead pastor of Calvary Church near Chicago. Ron helped produce curriculum on sexual healing now used by Desert Stream Ministries in hundreds of churches throughout the country. Ron lives with his wife, Amy, in Crown Point, Indiana.

Product Reviews

4.7 Stars Out Of 5
4.7 out of 5
4.6 out Of 5
(4.6 out of 5)
4.2 out Of 5
(4.2 out of 5)
Meets Expectations:
4.4 out Of 5
(4.4 out of 5)
of customers would recommend this product to a friend.
Displaying items 1-5 of 6
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  1. 5 Stars Out Of 5
    July 25, 2016
    mother in Michigan
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    The book is an excellent resource at a time when a parent/person is torn as to how to love the child/person, but not compromise their personal biblical beliefs. The book reiterates the Bible's perspective and views on homosexuality and at the same time, gives strategies on how to have a continued relationship with a child/friend/person, who has chosen a lifestyle in the LGBT community.

    Every church and Christian bookstore should have several copies of this on its shelves. The book offers ways Christians can show love to people in the LGBTQ community, as Jesus would have, without compromising Biblical principals.
  2. 5 Stars Out Of 5
    Well written and thought out, a book all Christians should read
    December 22, 2014
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    Occasionally a book comes along that everyone should read. This is one such book. You'd have to be totally asleep to not see the militaristic and bullying-like tactics of those who want to further the gay agenda with the end result of silencing anyone who dares disagree.

    And yet for every gay person marching in a gay parade and trying to force his views on anyone who dares disagree, there are people in our churches and families quietly struggling with the issue. And those who may be out, yet are not confrontational about it and we may work with or live beside, or even have in our family.

    How does one stand against the gay bullies, stand against the push for this lifestyle to be taught in schools, to fight for religious freedoms that seem to get bulldozed in the name of gay rights, while still loving those who struggle with same-sex attractions and/or fully embrace them? How does one show compassion without compromising and going against God and His Word?

    This isn't a long book, coming in at only 158 pages, but the authors do a great job of covering the issue and providing some great answers. They address and answer several questions throughout the book from people from things like if you should attend a gay wedding, what to do if your child tells you they are gay, etc.

    They also cover why we can't cave into the idea that God is OK with homosexuality. They use Scripture to back up their points, and answer some common arguments used by those who are trying to revise what the Bible says about the issue.

    Christians need to be ready to deal with things they will face in regards to this issue, and they need to understand it better and how to love and relate to those who are dealing with it. This book will help in those areas. I highly recommend it.

    There is a website with more about the book and authors, including a downloadable study guide for the book at
  3. Age: 25-34
    Gender: female
    4 Stars Out Of 5
    Compassion Rules
    December 19, 2014
    Age: 25-34
    Gender: female
    Quality: 3
    Value: 3
    Meets Expectations: 3
    Romans 3:23- For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.

    How many times as Christians do we forget that. Even if we are saved we still can struggle with sin. That is why I really enjoyed the way Compassion Without Compromise was presented. Adam Barr and Ron Citlau have such of way of making one see how important it is to walk in humility just like Jesus.

    While I dont want to start a debate about whether homosexuality is a sin or not, this book helped me see how scripture views it. One of my favorite quotes from the books came on page 54 We love Jesus, as long as he conforms to our image. We cant make Jesus conform to us, we have to conform to his ways.

    This book is hard to review because there is so much to discuss here. Just let me say if you are struggling with how, as Christians, we should be viewing and dealing with the homosexuality this book will help. It will help break down the worlds view with scripture based arguments. Oh and they arent just old testament!

    My two favorite chapters ended up being Spots on a Leopard and When Push Comes to Shove. You could just tell the authors cared and put thought into what they wrote. But most importantly the emphasis on not judging others sins. Loved that part.
  4. Indianapolis, IN
    Age: 35-44
    Gender: female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    Timely Conversation!
    December 1, 2014
    Cassie Hale
    Indianapolis, IN
    Age: 35-44
    Gender: female
    "Compassion Without Compromise" by Adam T. Barr and Ron Citlau is the best book on current events in the church and culture I have read in a very long time. It is the conversation that needs to happen and is captured perfectly by the subtitle: How the Gospel Frees Us to Love Our Gay Friends Without Losing the Truth. This book beautifully walks the line of walking in Truth in both grace and love. Not only does it dig deeper into Scriptures used to show that Truth remains despite cultural trends, but it also does so in a way that is filled with relational understanding as one of the authors has battled with same-sex attraction most of his life, including full immersion in the sin itself.

    This book has a wonderful Q/A section that I think is important to get into the hands of every Pastor and church leader. It addressed some issues I had never even considered before, and it also showed the sin of the attitudes so prevalent in many churches to the point of abusing and degrading another human being. This is a perfect reminder that while we in no way change Scripture to suit our own personal experiences and desires, we do not disregard the real conflict, temptation, and struggles that anyone facing such things experiences.

    This is a timely resource for a much needed conversation in today's church. I highly recommend this book to every demographic in the church. In fact, I had regular discussions with friends, my husband, as well as my children ranging in age from Junior High through High School. It was excellently written, and I will be passing this along to my Pastor.
  5. Ontario, Canada
    Age: 45-54
    Gender: male
    4 Stars Out Of 5
    Book's Title Takes on a Big Challenge
    November 30, 2014
    Paul ThinkingOutLoud
    Ontario, Canada
    Age: 45-54
    Gender: male
    Quality: 5
    Value: 3
    Meets Expectations: 4
    ...There were a couple of sections toward the end of the book I felt the authors handled very well. One was a dismissal of the argument that many of the laws in Leviticus no longer apply today, so why should we hang on to one single aspect of sexuality, when we are quick to ignore prohibitions against, for example, wearing clothing of mixed fibers? The authors point out four specific Old Testament commandments concerning sex that are repeated in the New Testament. That chapter is must reading if you know someone who always raises that particular objection.

    The other section I liked, though it will frustrate some readers, was a Q & Q chapter -- I've named it that because there were no answers, hence not Q & A -- listing all of the various scenarios currently encountered as a result of the rapidly changing culture. I found this catalog of thorny issues and hot potatoes, most of which are not so hypothetical, to be useful in understanding the challenges Christians now face. But I also wished that chapter had appeared at the beginning of the book, and had in fact been the basis of what followed...

    from my review at Thinking Out Loud WordPress blog / review copy provided by Baker Books
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