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Has striving to achieve more and be successful damaged your family's relationships? Focusing on seven common parenting dysfunctions including being permissive, critical, or self-indulgent - family ministry expert Dr. Michelle Anthony offers fresh insights, reflection questions, and Scripture verses to help you pursue the abundant family life Jesus intends, instead of the seductive alternatives the world offers.
|Format: DRM Free ePub|
Vendor: David C. Cook
Publication Date: 2015
**Includes Scripture guides, reflection questions, ideas for family rites of passage, and other real-life family examples.
Press Release Q & A with Michelle Anthony▼▲
Q: In the book, you present six dysfunctional parenting styles. Of those six, which do you think is the most common?
All of these represent the common dysfunctions in today's families. What is interesting about them is that these are the "acceptable" dysfunctions...so much so that we don't normally think of these styles as "dysfunctional." We tend to think of addiction and abuse as dysfunctional, but things such as control and friendship in parenting as good things. So when these things begin to creep into the excessive category we simply justify we are doing more of a good thing rather than engaging in a habit stemming from a place of brokenness or dysfunction.
I have found rarely do we fit neatly into one category. Often we see many of these dysfunctions and/or their tendencies woven together in our lives. Once we take our eyes off God's plan, this loss of focus opens up our families to all kinds of "acceptable" dysfunctions simply to survive.
Q: What have you done to avoid dysfunction in your own parenting?
I have seen all of these dysfunctions in my parenting at one point or another. At the root of these dysfunctions is sin. Because I am sinful, I am susceptible to any and all of these every day. The best way to be a spiritually healthy parent is to be a spiritually healthy individual. I thrive as a parent when I am living in concert with God's way and keeping a pure and humble heart before Him. When I am regularly in God's Word, bringing all things to Him in prayer and thankfulness and being honest about my need for Him, my kids reap the benefits of having a mom who is living with Christ's love and grace. Yet when I live my life on my own terms and neglect His Word and my prayer life, my sin seems less offensive. Then my kids and those in my family are victims of my selfishness.
Q: What should a parent do if they recognize themselves in the descriptions of dysfunctional parents you've included in Becoming a Spiritually Healthy Family?
The first part is simply to recognize the dysfunctional behavior. Next, to accept responsibility for its presence instead of blaming others is important too. Once this has taken place, I encourage parents to have a conversation with God about it - simply as if you were sharing it with a friend. God is not going to be surprised by what we say; He already knows it all. He is gracious and loving and will give us wisdom right away on how to deal with things in a more God-honoring and healthy manner. Often God will use a close friend, pastor or counselor to bring clarity to the next steps, so we should seek those individuals in our lives for fresh perspective and accountability.
Q: Why is it important for parents to identify whether or not they were themselves parented in a dysfunctional style?
If we can understand where we came from, often it will inform where we are going. Parents typically fall into either repeating sin patterns that were handed down to them or they will swing the pendulum to the opposite extreme and begin a new dysfunction in an almost-rebellious response that is motivated by a heart that does not want to repeat how their parents did it. Neither of these extremes solves the problem. Yet, taking an honest assessment of how we were parented and the good and bad impact it has had on us creates an environment for parents to make healthy and appropriate adjustments to their new families.
Q: What does a spiritually healthy family look like?
A spiritually healthy family is made up of members who, in a relationship with Jesus, seek to understand and live a surrendered life to God's plan and will. Through God's Word they learn this plan, are convicted by God's Spirit to understand sin areas and allow forgiveness and grace to heal broken places in theirs. They understand that without God's help and power, they will not be able to live in peace or victory.
More About the Book▼▲
No one who starts a family plans on falling into patterns of dysfunction, but between the baggage of the past and the pressures of the world today, developing destructive parenting patterns is all too easy. Family ministry leader Dr. Michelle Anthony has now brought hope and practical help to parents in her new book, Becoming a Spiritually Healthy Family: Avoiding the 6 Dysfunctional Parenting Styles.
Outlining the six most common dysfunctional parenting styles, such as the "I-Can't-Say-No Parent," the "Criticizing Parent" and the "Double-Minded Parent", Anthony offers grace to parents who fall short, while providing practical tips, advice, activities and reflective questions at the end of each chapter that will help parents envision what it looks like for a family to follow Jesus and not the seductive alternatives the world offers.
VicsMediaRoomIrvine, CAAge: 55-65Gender: male5 Stars Out Of 5A Resource For Parents To Help Change HabitsFebruary 23, 2015VicsMediaRoomIrvine, CAAge: 55-65Gender: maleQuality: 5Value: 5Meets Expectations: 5Michelle Anthony in her new book Becoming a Spiritually Healthy Family published by David C. Cook gives us Avoiding the 6 Dysfunctional Parenting Styles.
From the back cover: Whos in charge of your family: You or Jesus?
We all want to guide our children into the abundant life that Jesus offers. But when we pursue the more and better that the world offers above our pursuit of Jesus, we fall into dangerous parenting habits.
In Becoming a Spiritually Formed Family, Michelle Anthony unpacks six common dysfunctional parenting styles that we fall into out of habit, lack of attention, or just oversight due to busyness. If you long to show your children Jesus but dont know how to do it, youll find hope in this practical guide to creating a relentlessly grace-filled home that is focused on God as first in charge.Includes Scripture guides, reflection questions, ideas for family rites of passage, and other real life family examples.
A habit is something that we fall into simply by doing the same action over and over. When it is a bad habit it can help make our family dysfunctional. The good news is that all it takes to break a bad habit is to replace it with new actions that make a good habit that will help make our family functional. Easy? No. Doable? Yes! Ms. Anthony identifies six dysfunctional habits: 1) The Double-Minded Parent, 2) The I-Cant-Say-No Parent, 3) The Driver Parent, 4) The Micro-Managing Parent, 5) The Criticizing Parent, 6) The Absentee Parent. Each chapter ends with a Reflect And Respond where there are reflection questions to help clarify the thoughts of the chapter. As I said bad habits can be changed. Dysfunctional families can be turned around to become highly functional. Becoming a Spiritually Healthy Family can help immensely. I recommend this book highly.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Litfuse Publicity Group. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commissions 16 CFR, Part 255: Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.
LalaAge: 18-24Gender: female4 Stars Out Of 5Eye-Opening and Informative!February 20, 2015LalaAge: 18-24Gender: femaleQuality: 4Value: 5Meets Expectations: 4Becoming a Spiritually Healthy Family was very eye-opening in many ways as well as very informative. I appreciated Michelle breaking down the 6 parenting styles, but also how she gives hope to parents who might fall in that category. I know there were some places that really convicted me!
One thing that helped me stay in engaged was Michelles writing style. I felt like she was having more of a one-on-one conversation with me rather than just presenting information I might not fully comprehend. I also liked how she didnt present herself as better than anyone, but shared some stories of her own struggles making her easily relatable too.
There were a few places that I did feel she was a little long-winded. It was in these few places that I had to flip back to see what we were talking about again.
However, even with that said this is a great read. I love the encouragement she brings as well as awesome examples to inspire and help be a healthy spiritual family (my favorites were writing a family mission statement and spiritual scrapbooks).
I recommend this novel to parents who desire to have their family as a whole draw closer to God and need encouragement from others' stories, sound advice, and through the Word of God itself.
*(I received this book from the publisher and Litfuse Publicity in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts expressed are my own and I was not required to write a positive review.)*
UrailakOregonAge: 35-44Gender: female4 Stars Out Of 5Prescription for Your Family's Spiritual HealthFebruary 13, 2015UrailakOregonAge: 35-44Gender: femaleQuality: 4Value: 4Meets Expectations: 4Parents usually care about their children's health and do their best to make sure they are healthy physically, emotionally, mentally, and socially. How about spiritually? It's very important for Christian parents to help their families become spiritually healthy. The author shows us the 6 dysfunctional parenting styles that we should avoid: having divided devotion, being permissive, pressuring to succeed, overbearing, criticizing, and being unavailable. God is writing and directing our stories and our children's stories. If we want the abundant life God envisions for our families, it's best for us to follow His script and not try to write our own. We don't have to live with dysfunction. Parenting is difficult and challenging, even more so when you have special needs children. However, God's Word and principles still apply. The author uses Biblical truths to offer us hope and give us healthy solutions for our families. The book covers several topics such as worry, worldliness, Enemy, truth, freedom, bitterness, spiritual battle, perfectionism, perspective, letting go of the need to control, brokenness, blessings, family mission statement, discipleship, traditions, and more. I like the 4 steps in responding to today's families on page 99 and I really like Chapter 9: Beyond Good Behavior and Chore Charts. Heart transformation, not behavioral modification, is what we want for our children. Gospel-living, not moralism, is what they need.
Each chapter starts with an insightful quote and ends with thought-provoking questions for readers to reflect and respond. The book includes Appendix A: The Ten Environments, Appendix B: Questions to Consider in Writing a Family Mission Statement, Appendix 3: Forms to help you write a mission statement. I highly recommend this practical, Biblically sound book to all parents, especially Christian parents!
"Children raised by the Spiritually Healthy parent often grow up knowing God, loving others, living a life of meaning, and recognizing that this world is not their ultimate home." (p. 29)
"Really good people are not what Jesus asked for. He asked for people of faith. And faith is so much messier (and harder to measure) than moral behavior." (p.146)
~I received a free copy of this book via Litfuse Publicity Group in exchange for my honest review. All opinions are my own.
Kristieupstate NYAge: 25-34Gender: female5 Stars Out Of 5A parenting must-read!February 12, 2015Kristieupstate NYAge: 25-34Gender: femaleQuality: 5Value: 5Meets Expectations: 5Michelle Anthony's "Becoming A Spiritually Healthy Family" is a must-read parenting book for all parents! This book is such an encouraging and uplifting book that will boost your determination and convictions in regards to raising your children. I find myself getting caught up in the busyness of life and the every day routine that it is so easy to let "little things" slide and picking and choosing battles, but ultimately choosing the easy way more often than not. This is just the book I needed to really encourage me to stay strong. There are sections devoted to 6 dysfunctional parenting styles and what consists of those. Then there are ways to avoid these styles and better ways of parenting. I found this book to be extremely useful and encouraging and I know I will be rereading sections and referring back to it time after time when I feel like I may need that little extra boost and encouragement.
richard r blakeBridgman, MIAge: Over 65Gender: male4 Stars Out Of 5Choosing Abundant Life as an Alternative to Dysfunctional ParentingJanuary 22, 2015richard r blakeBridgman, MIAge: Over 65Gender: maleIn her book Becoming A Spiritually Healthy Family Michelle Anthony compares our life journey to that of families working together to live on script each day, pressing on toward the goal. She identifies six dysfunctional parenting styles and shows how by shifting our goals we can live abundant lives resulting in spiritually healthy families.
Anthony helps the reader identify their parenting style, assess family relationships, determine responses, and consider fresh perspectives. She uses personal experiences; illustrative stories, Biblical examples, and practical Reflect and Respond questions and exercises to form practical affirmation statements, and action plans, for formulating authentic environments for becoming a spiritually healthy family.
Becoming a Spiritually Healthy Family is packed with workable Biblical principles and practical life changing guideline, inspiring a new generation of parents to model Christ and to train their children to know Gods Word and respond to His love through a commitment to follow Him.
A complimentary copy of this book was provided for review purposes. The opinions expressed are my own.
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