It’s another day in the women’s prison you know all too well. It’s just like the day before and the one before that – ‘same s**t, different day’ – as the saying goes. Except this day is slightly different because you’re in countdown mode. Your release, ‘on the out’, is getting noticeably closer. You’ve been in prison a little while, it may be your ninth or tenth stretch, and you’ve stopped counting even if others haven’t. You’ve been there so often you know the daily routine, the pace of life and where everything is. You know when to smile or cry, and when to look strong or vulnerable. You save the vulnerable look for the officers, the tears for the chaplain, but for the other prisoners, you maintain a strong smile. You never show the scared or frightened look – not to anyone. Not ever. Right now, you’re wearing the ‘hard woman’ look – the one that says, ‘Don’t’ mess with me’ or ‘I’m not interested, so go away.’ Your face is deliberately blank, disengaged and disinterested. Officers know when to bother you and when to leave you alone. You know most of them on your wing, although there are always a few newbies you’ve not come across before. You can always tell a new officer by how keen they appear – so ready to help and some can be easily taken advantage of. Of course, some officers are power crazy and love swinging their keys, barking orders and having their favourite prisoners, but you know there are some good ones as well, who listen and tell you exactly how ‘it’ is. They do this in a nice way but with honesty and authority, and if they say they’ll do something, they do it and if they can’t, they’ll tell you. Every prisoner likes to know ‘where they stand’ and have clarity because after all, false promises are aggravating. The prison has been around some while but doesn’t smell like some can, other than when the onsite sanitation tank is emptied. You hate the awful, overpowering stink of poo that fills the air. Thankfully, that only happens once a fortnight and is not close to the house blocks. Bad as the smell is, it’s not as impacting as the noise of the prisoners you encounter when you first go onto the house block. The smell of poo is on the other side of the prison, but the noise is all around you. It hits you every time, especially when you’ve been away from prison for a while, or if you arrive at medication time (when the meds are being dispensed). Yet you fairly quickly get used to it. Some prisoners even miss the noise when they leave, just like the rattling of the keys – a familiar sound to every prisoner.
