Redemptive Divorce: Guidance for the Suffering Partner, Healing for the Offending Spouse, and the Best Catalyst for Restoration  -     By: Mark Gaither
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Redemptive Divorce: Guidance for the Suffering Partner, Healing for the Offending Spouse, and the Best Catalyst for Restoration

Thomas Nelson / 2008 / Paperback

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Product Description

Redemptive Divorce is a practical and unique book offering guidance and healing to both the suffering partner and the offending spouse. It gently guides readers through a redemptive divorce process that instead of condemning offers hope and restoration. Included are helpful charts and worksheets as well as useful information for pastors, counselors, attorneys, and concerned family members and friends. Paperback.

Product Information

Format: Paperback
Number of Pages: 176
Vendor: Thomas Nelson
Publication Date: 2008
Dimensions: 8.38 X 5.44 (inches)
ISBN: 078522856X
ISBN-13: 9780785228561
Availability: In Stock

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Publisher's Description

A graceful, biblical way to reclaim sanity for the home and dignity for the suffering spouse in a dysfunctional or dangerous marriage.

Thousands of conscientious believers wanting to honor the sacred vows they took before God suffer in dysfunctional, even dangerous marriages. Each and every day they must choose between the lesser of two evils: divorce without sound biblical support or a life of perpetual, unrelenting misery. Somewhere between the secular disregard for the commands of Christ and the sacred unwillingness to deal with real problems of people, there is a way.

The redemptive divorce process is designed to honor the sacredness of the union while offering practical relief for the suffering partner and tough love for the offending spouse. In some cases, it might even be the catalyst for the restoration and rebuilding of the marriage. Practical, provocative, and utterly unique, Redemptive Divorce includes a helpful guide with worksheets for implementation.

Author Bio

Mark W. Gaither, with a Master of Theology degree from Dallas Theological Seminary, has been researching and writing Christian materials for authors and ministries for years. Redemptive Divorce is born out of the pain and trauma of divorce when his redemptive offer was refused. Mark later met and married Charissa, and now enjoys the benefits of this biblically sound, grace-oriented process: a clear conscience and a future without regrets.

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Author/Artist Review

Author: Mark W. Gaither
Located in: Frisco, TX
Submitted: February 21, 2008

    Tell us a little about yourself.  Following a fifteen-year career as an engineer, I earned a Master of Theology degree from Dallas Theological Seminary, where I discovered a love for teaching and writing. After writing for Dr. Frank Minirth, I served as a the director of creative ministries and writer for Insight for Living, the radio ministry of Chuck Swindoll, during which time I served as Dr. Swindoll’s editor and research assistant, a role I continue to enjoy. My wife, Charissa, and I reside in Frisco, Texas and have four children—Lauren, Parker, Robert, and Heather—who attend college. In addition to writing, teaching, and speaking (individually and as a couple), we lead single adults at Stonebriar Community Church.

    What was your motivation behind this project?  Thousands of conscientious followers of Jesus Christ presently suffer in dysfunctional, even dangerous marriages because they want to honor their wedding day vows. Each and every day, they must choose between the lesser of two evils: divorce without sound biblical support or a life of perpetual, unrelenting misery. Somewhere between the secular disregard for the commands of Christ and the sacred unwillingness to deal with real problems of people, there is a way. I wanted to provide a practical, biblical solution to what many see as a no-win scenario. This biblical, practical approach to addressing unrepentant sin in a wayward spouse honors the sacredness of the union, offering practical relief for the suffering partner and healing hope to the offending spouse. It might even become the catalyst for the restoration and rebuilding of the marriage.

    What do you hope folks will gain from this project?  The book is written for people struggling to survive in dysfunctional or dangerous marriages, as well as those who want to help them, such as pastors, counselors, attorneys, family, and friends. They will discover: Practical solutions: Morally upright, legal recourse to restore sanity to the home and freedom to make it a safe, healthy environment for the rest of the family. Restored dignity: The ability to take charge of an impossible situation that once kept the upright spouse helpless and hopeless. Firm boundaries: Empowerment to establish moral and legal accountability for the immoral choices or behavior of the offending spouse. Gracious counsel: A process that offers the offending spouse a responsible path to restoration of the marriage and healing for everyone. A clear conscience: If properly applied, the ability to say with complete sincerity, “I gave my spouse every opportunity for restoration, but he or she chose sin over the marriage.”

    How were you personally impacted by working on this project?  Any conversation about the book rarely ended without someone mentioning a friend, family member, parishioner, or client who needed this resource. Frequently, they pleaded, "Hurry up and finish the book!"

    Who are your influences, sources of inspiration or favorite authors / artists?  The top influences are, especially as it relates to this book, Chuck Swindoll, James Dobson, Dave Carder, Henry Cloud, John Townsend, and Muriel Canfield.

    Anything else you'd like readers / listeners to know:  I chose the words "redemptive divorce" carefully when thinking of what to call this radically different way of thinking. The phrase is deliberately paradoxical and in some ways counterintuitive. But, as I trust you will discover, it describes the process well. In the meantime, don’t let the name throw you off. This is not a book about divorce, although the marriage may officially end. The wholehearted intent of this process is to save a marriage that seems to be over and in all likelihood destined for the divorce courts. When applied correctly, this redemptive process honors the institution of marriage by taking the vows seriously. Rather than merely looking to the upright spouse to hang in there through thick and thin, it transfers responsibility for saving the marriage to the offending spouse, who in fact controls the destiny of the union. Rather than placing unrealistic expectations on the upright spouse, this tough-love approach communicates realistic expectations to the offending spouse and provides a means of genuine accountability. Redemptive divorce draws a clear line in the sand, refusing to tolerate unrepentant sin. But rather than condemn and reject the sinner, it offers hope and restoration.

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