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4 Stars Out Of 5
reassuring that I'm on the right track
November 21, 2012
I felt like most of their suggestions were right on; however, sometimes I felt like the suggestion to get counseling was too frequent. Also the hands-off approach when an adult child strays from your values seemed a little too relaxed for me.
In this book Dr.s's Campbell and Chapman walk you through how to develop a relationship with your adult child that is both nurturing and friend. They discuss different difficulties you may face when dealing with an adult child and provide practical advice on how to best mentor/befriend your child without straining your relationship or putting additional burden on you. Finally, they discuss how to leave a true legacy for your children.
I found this book interesting in different ways. The overall concept was great but they seemed to think that the only people with adult children would be those over 50. Many of their examples of now vs. then is 50 years ago vs. today. As a matter of fact, at the beginning of the book they state that while this is mostly focused on those adult children between 18-30, they also state that some of the discussion will help you understand "your older adult children, especially those Gen Xers in their late thirties and forties." That would be me and my husband. We have adult children.
Additionally, many of the examples they provided were of more affluent people. They frequently discussed helping to pay for counseling or when you should or shouldn't use money to help. I will never be in the financial situation that many of the example families are in so I therefore did not always relate.
However, they did cover the whole gamut of situations you might deal with as the parent of an adult child. They were not afraid to tackle any issue and discuss how you can emotionally cope and handle the situation so as to still have an in-tact relationship with your child. I also enjoyed how the Dr's gave you hope that it is never too late to develop a better relationship with your child or serve as a better role model.
The book was well laid out and thought through. I would recommend it to other with the caveat that if you are not well-to-do you need to read through the examples and see how you may have reacted to the situation sans money.
I received a copy of this book from the publisher for the purpose of this review
I had read the authors book How to Really Love Your Child when my children were very young and it was very helpful to me;a great resource.This book continued with the help,support and information now that my children are adults. I have also read his book, How to Really Love Your Grandchild-excellent.!I would recommend each of these books because you will be encouraged and given very useful information for each of the stages of your life.Love is the foundation,but we need to know how the child/adult can receive that love. I am thankful for these books!