Pulling Back the Shades: Erotica, Intimacy, and the Longings of a Woman's Heart  -     By: Dr. Juli Slattery, Dannah Gresh
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Pulling Back the Shades: Erotica, Intimacy, and the Longings of a Woman's Heart

Moody Publishing / 2014 / Paperback

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Product Description

Christian women don't have to choose between being sexual and spiritual. They have legitimate longings that the Church has been afraid to talk about, and books like Fifty Shades of Grey exploit. Whether you are single or married, sexually dead or just looking to revive your sex life, Pulling Back the Shades will address your desire to be both sexual AND spiritual. With solid Biblical teaching and transparent stories, trusted authors Dannah Gresh and Dr. Juli Slattery, offer an unflinching look at the most personal questions women ask. The book offers practical advice for women to address five core longings:

  • to be cherished by a man
  • to be protected by a strong man
  • to rescue a man
  • to be sexually alive
  • to escape reality

God designed women with these longings and has a plan to satisfy them. It's time for women to identify their intimate longings and God-honoring ways to fulfill them.

Product Information

Format: Paperback
Number of Pages: 176
Vendor: Moody Publishing
Publication Date: 2014
Dimensions: 7.5 X 5.125 X .38 (inches)
ISBN: 080241088X
ISBN-13: 9780802410887
Availability: In Stock

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Author Bio

DR. JULI SLATTERY is a widely known clinical psychologist, author, speaker, and broadcast media professional. Her commitment to biblical principles, relatable style, and quick wit have made her a highly sought after speaker to women's groups. Juli's books include Finding the Hero in Your Husband, No More Headaches, and Guilt Free Motherhood.She and her husband Mark have been married for 18 years and have three children.

DANNAH GRESH is a bestselling author and co-founder of Pure Freedom. Dannah's books include And the Bride Wore White , What Are You Waiting For: The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex, and Lies Young Women Believe (co-authored with Nancy Leigh DeMoss), in addition to the Secret Keeper series. She is also a frequent guest for national radio, TV and print mediums. Dannah lives in State College, Pennsylvania, with her husband, Bob, and their three children.

Product Reviews

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Displaying items 1-5 of 9
Page 1 of 2 12 Next
  1. 5 Stars Out Of 5
    Pulling Back the Shades
    November 22, 2014
    Linda
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    Excellent! I gave it to my granddaughter.
  2. Hawaii
    Age: Over 65
    Gender: female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    Pulling Back the Shades
    November 1, 2014
    auntyhonu
    Hawaii
    Age: Over 65
    Gender: female
    Familiar with only the title, not the content, of the original Fifty Shades of Gray, I was grateful to have the content explained by this book instead. Certainly, every Christian woman should read it so as to have an answer for those who suggest reading 50 shades as an enhancement to their life. Nothing could be further from the Truth! We are to be IN the world but not OF it.... regardless of the justifications and excuses all around us.
  3. Oak Harbor, WA
    Age: 55-65
    Gender: female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    Sexual satisfaction the right way
    April 30, 2014
    bookwomanjoan
    Oak Harbor, WA
    Age: 55-65
    Gender: female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    Have you read Fifty Shades of Grey? Gresh was sure Christian women would not be reading it. She was wrong. Spiritual women do read erotica. Slattery reluctantly decided to read the books, knowing she would coauthor a book about them.

    This book was birthed as a result of the impact of the Fifty Shades books. It is a book about longings, questions, and wholeness as spiritual and sexual women. Many Christian women will not talk about their psychological and physical longings. Some have turned to erotica, thinking that will fulfill their needs. The authors reveal the dangers of doing so. It is chasing after a fantasy, a distortion of reality.

    Slattery argues that there is a spiritual agenda to the Fifty Shades books. The intended spiritual destination is destruction. The authors explore the spiritual nature and sacredness of sex, the lies in erotica and the long-term effects of reading it, the nature of submission, the source of true sexual pleasure, being spiritually satisfied in Jesus, repentance, and action to take.

    The authors have included many stories from women to support their arguments. They also identify reality: "Life is hard; not every longing you have on earth will be fulfilled." (119)

    As the authors note, this book is not ultimately about the Fifty Shades series of books or even erotica. "This book is about the spiritual battle for the hearts and souls of women." (146) It is not only an encouragement to throw out the junk but also to join in the call for revival among God's women. There is a good section with questions for group discussion so this would make a great choice for a women's group. There is also an appendix with very practical ideas for victory over sexual sin.

    Note: potential readers need to know that these authors are very frank in their discussion. They cover sexual practices I've not seen discussed with such openness and clarity before.

    This book is serious. It is a serious topic and one that needs to be addressed and talked about by Christian women. If you or a friend are trying to find satisfaction in erotica, I urge you to read this book.

    I received a complimentary copy of this book through Icon Media Group for the purpose of an independent and honest review.
  4. Ohio
    Age: 18-24
    Gender: female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    April 28, 2014
    gcwfarmgirl
    Ohio
    Age: 18-24
    Gender: female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    I have to admit, I did not, have not, and will not read the Fifty Shades series.

    I also do not have any issue with erotica or "mommy porn". And yet, I was extremely excited to have a chance to read this book! I feel that the issues this books covers can apply to so much more (such as television shows-i.e. Game of Thrones, True Bloods, etc.)

    This book IS NOT just for married women. It's definitely written for ALL women!

    We all have longings and desires.

    This book talks about what some do with those longings and the dangers of those actions. Dannah and Juli brake down our needs as a fulfilled woman into five different areas. Through a dialogue style writting- filled with personal stories- they 'pull back the shades' and reveal the deeper threat to ourselves and our marriages.

    This book isn't filled with shame, it's filled with hope. We don't have to decide it we want to be spiritual or sexual. God created us to be both.

    "This book is not ultimately about the Fifty Shades series or even about erotica. This book is about the spiritual battle for the hearts and souls of women." - Pulling Back the Shades (p. 146)

    Now, to prepare to write this book, Juli, with lots of prayer, read the Fifty Shades series and this is what she had to say about it:

    "As mentioned earlier, I read all three of the books in the Fifty Shades series. The explicit scenes bothered me, but what haunted me even more was the seemingly intentional agenda to drag God and His holiness into the sewer. Most people who read these books seem to be so mesmerized by the sexuality that they appear to walk right past what I perceive as an even greater danger and offense: spiritual darkness." -Pulling Back the Shades (p. 46)

    It truly shocked me when she talked about the "Christian metaphors and allusions" in the book...pages 46-50 had my mouth dropped (how can Christians read Fifty Shades and not be disturbed!).

    Although the book itself is a quick read, it's very well written from a biblical standpoint of sexuality and spirituality -again you don't have to choose between them. I found even with such a sensitive topic the book was easy to read, written in a "coffee with friends" manner.
  5. Columbus GA
    Age: 25-34
    Gender: female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    A Book for Every Woman in Every Relationship
    April 16, 2014
    Abby Kelly
    Columbus GA
    Age: 25-34
    Gender: female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    I started this book review purely altruistically—to write a review that might help others who really need to read the book. I mean, after all, I have my own set of temptations and struggles, but erotica isn't one of them. And my marriage of 11 years isn't perfect by any means, but I've also read most of the relationship books recommended by Focus on the Family. What new, life changing information could this book have to offer?

    Through the second chapter, my expectations were confirmed. But by the time I got to chapter 7, "The Spiritually Satisfied Woman", I was convicted, challenged, inspired and refreshed.

    Dr. Juli Slattery and Dannah Gresh collaborate seamlessly in their new book, Pulling Back the Shades. Instead of blending their voices, they alternate, often switching authors in the middle of a chapter. Different fonts designate who is speaking. Neither woman dominates the book; both write from their expertise. Even though they admit they differ on a few issues and come from vastly different backgrounds, Dr. Slattery and Gresh present a powerful, united front on a sensitive subject that provokes many disagreements among believers, if we even have the courage to discuss it.

    The first half of the book is devoted to explaining erotica. This includes the chemical effect that it has on the brain, the addictive nature, the conflicts about it within the church, a discussion of the ‘grey' areas and a staunch stance against it based on the Word of God. Dr. Slattery and Gresh write graphically, borrowing short segments from the book, Fifty Shades of Grey, to make their points.

    The authors' opinion is uncompromising. To sum it up in a simple statement, without re-writing the book: God's ideal for sex is unabashed, exciting, varied, exquisite intimacy within the bonds of marriage.

    I mentioned that my heart began to resonate with the book beginning in chapter 7. This is where Dr. Slattery and Gresh delve into the incredible and unique intimacy that God wants to have with each of us.

    Here, they debunk the myth that God promises every woman a "happily ever after", fulfilling, intimate relationship with a man—even after marriage.

    "I bet you've never heard a sermon on what God does not promise. This is unfortunate because it is quite dangerous to place your trust in things you falsely assume God has promised. Jesus said that He came that you may have life and have it abundantly. His promises are great and He is trustworthy in fulfilling each one. But His ways are not our ways, and He has not promised some of the things you may have assumed or hoped He has."

    I am in one of those marriage that doesn't quite live up to all my expectations. It is easy to cry out, "God, this isn't what you intended for marriage! It's not fair." This leads to dissatisfaction and bitterness in the one relationship that should most closely mirror my relationship with Jesus.

    But wait_if I have this relationship with Jesus, can I live without the "perfect" marriage?

    The authors mention a quote by Dr. Larry Crabb, "God is all I need, but I don't know Him well enough for Him to be all I have."

    This brought a twinge of conviction and a huge sigh of relief. I do not need to fret over whether my husband ever changes and becomes more affectionate, more intimate, more interested in sex. I must know God well enough that He is not only all I need, but all I have.

    The book closes with numerous Scripture references and gentle guidance to help readers begin deepening their intimate relationship with Jesus. It even includes discussion questions, practical resources (other books and websites) as well as enumerated suggestions for practical application.

    This book is applicable to all women in all relationships—even those who are single—and even those who don't think they have a problem with erotica. The book covers all aspects of a woman's relational needs and explains where fulfillment is found.
Displaying items 1-5 of 9
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