In her book No More Perfect Moms, Jill Savage speaks of the damage unrealistic expectations can do to a woman's relationships and self-confidence. Women tend to be "contaminated" with what Savage calls "the perfection infection"; a need for our bodies, marriages, kids, friends, homes, homemaking; our very days to be perfect. Reality is not perfection. Unrealistic expectations only bring frustration and discontent with our lives and the real people in them.
Pride, fear, insecurity, and judging all work to keep us infected with perfectionism. We need to stop comparing ourselves to others or to media representations and change our expectations to something more realistic. Pride should be dropped for humility. Replace fear with courage. Take off insecurity and put on confidence. Leave judgement for grace.
Savage's last chapter deals with the very perfect God who counterbalances our imperfections. His love is unchanging, unconditional. His strength is made perfect in our weakness.
I so needed this shot of reality! I compare myself to others. I fall short. This makes me feel less than adequate in my own parenting journey. It causes a loop of derogatory self-talk, which makes me fearful and insecure. Courageous women are still fearful, but don't allow fear to stop them. I'm learning to look at myself as God does, through eyes of grace. Learning that the imperfections of my kids are not a reflection of me was very freeing. Taking care of my body is a stewardship issue and marriage is designed more to make me holy than to make me happy.
If you've ever felt isolated or "less than" as a mother, this is a great book - I highly recommend it! --Lisa White
No More Perfect Moms is by far the best book I've read in a long time. Jill Savage so easily connects with her readers and the struggles that they face. This book felt like it was written just for me! I had to read "No More Perfect Moms" with a pen in hand because there were so many lines and points that I wanted to be able to remember later. Buy a book for yourself and then buy a book for your best friend, your sister or the mom at church that might be struggling.
If you are looking for a one of a kind book about motherhood, No More Perfect Moms is for you. I LOVED the honesty in this book! The author shares many of her own personal struggles as a wife and mom and leaves you with the feeling that she's very much like you and me. "When we keep it real, other moms know they are normal." I love that quote from the book. I have heard Jill Savage speak at several conferences and always assumed she had it all together. Reading about her marriage struggles and other hurdles she's had to navigate through as a woman gave me hope and encouragement. Letting go of the notion that everyone else has it all together is a recurrent theme throughout the book. It's just what a recovering perfectionist like myself needed to hear.
Each chapter of the book has an "Apply the Antidote" section full of practical steps you can take to overcome perfection in your mothering and in every aspect of your life. This book is a must buy for anyone struggling with perfectionism.
A quick and easy read for moms who have trouble finding the time to make it through a book.
Moms of all types in all seasons of life are dealing with unrealistic expectations or "The Perfect Infection" as Jill Savage calls it in her new book, No More Perfect Moms. She gives "The Antidote" as taking off pride, fear, insecurity, and judgement and putting on humility, courage, confidence, and grace. Then very honestly she opens up about kids, body issues, marriage, friendship, day planning, houses, and homemaking. She shares the issues that moms deal with in these areas then encourages us and offers some practical tips. At the end of each chapter she shows how "The Antidote" will help us learn to embrace our beautiful, imperfect life. While she reminds us through out the book that we can't be perfect and need to be careful with unrealistic expectations, she concludes the book point us to the "One Perfect God". God is perfect in love, strength, identity, hope, truth, and redemption AND He is offering His hand to us. Then we can be at peaces as "imperfect moms partnering with a perfect God". What a wonderful way to end this book!
I have and will continue to highly recommended this book to my friends and I recommend it to you. We women need to learn how to love our real lives and that we are ok being imperfect. After you read this, I believe you will be able to sigh with relief as you realize that our lives need to be defined more by humility, courage, confidence and grace. We will not only be blessing ourselves, but our family and friends as we let go of our unrealistic expectations.
There are also more resources at the NoMorePerfectMoms website, including a leader's guide and discussion videos.
With a title like, "No More Perfect Moms," I thought this book would be entirely devoted to parenting. I was pleasantly surprised that it is more about life as a whole instead of focusing solely on motherhood.
As a perpetual perfectionist, I've learned so much from "No More Perfect Moms." Jill Savage has challenged me to change my expectations (not lower them, but change them) in regard to myself, my toddler, my schedule and even my home. Before I read this book, I had very high expectations of my toddler. Changing my expectations has helped me to be a more relaxed, realistic mother to my son. I feel less frazzled not only as a mother, but as a person.
If you're a perfectionist or ever compare your insides to someone else's outsides, as Jill mentions, then I highly recommend this book!