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5 Stars Out Of 5
November 17, 2011
I have ordered this book after reading Shepherding a Child's Heart and I am not dissapointed. It gives me the right perspective of discipline. The authors' personal experience and anecdotes are helpful for day-to-day situations in instructing a child's heart.
I listened to the book on CD, and enjoyed hearing their passion for God, his provision and his Gospel.
The book is in 3 parts: Importance of focusing on the heart more than behavior in discipling your child, second how to do formative instruction (where you talk of the glory of God and his provision in family, precepts and his church), and third how to apply this in discipline situations.
They showed me the danger of just using behavior modification techniques - they will just produce perfect pharisees who have been trained to be bribed by their pleasures rather than motivated by their hearts.
They emphasize the need to listen and understand your children before telling them what you think they need to know.
The best part is when they showed how to the power of the Gospel trains your child's heart. The basic technique is listening to what is motivating your child. Helping them to reflect on their motivations and evaluate their motivations. Coming along side of them and sharing how your motivations are often sinful, and how the forgiveness and redemption in Christ helps you overcome sinful motivations so they can learn to do the same in your life. Unlike many other parenting books, the goal of this one is to get your children to see that they need a savior, and that He can help. Already doing this with my 4-yr old. Can't say there's been a dramatic change in behavior, but we've had some very special conversations.