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4 Stars Out Of 5
Engaging, inciteful and helpful. No fluff.
March 5, 2012
What do you do when you feel torn between spending time at work and spending time with your family? What if your reasons for working more are good reasons?
I'm in the happy situation of being able to review books I'm interested in reading. No one is banging at my digital door telling me what to review so I get to pick what interests me. In this case, I wasn't really all that interested in the book_at first. Honestly, it was free and don't you ever feel like the advice in these books is just a rehash of another book? That's the way it felt to me_at first.
In the introduction Andy Stanley brings up the idea of cheating; work more and you cheat your family, put your family first and you cheat your job.
"We allocate our time the best we can, knowing all the while that somebody's going to feel cheated. Unfortunately, that â€˜somebody' is usually someone we care a great deal about." (Collide, Location 82, Kindle)
Well, wouldn't you know it, that resonated with me. From that point on this wasn't just a book of rehashed material, it was a convicting and timely piece of advice that I'm actually putting into practice. And that's what makes this review so hard to write. I want to tell you everything, but if I do you won't buy the book and that's probably not fair to the author.
But let me give you the rundown.
Stanley's way of writing is engaging, but at the same time very matter-of-fact. There's no bottom line feel good message of, "Just do this and everything will be great!" If this title got your attention that may be what you were looking for, a quick fix. There isn't one. The good news is the answer is simple. Simple like telling a smoker they just need to quit smoking, Stanley says.
"But suffering in silence is not an option. Complaining to your friends isn't a solution either."
Stanley accurately states the problem that many of us have: we cheat our families out of our time by convincing ourselves that we are doing good by working more.
We know we should spend more time with our families. We know that no one nearing the end of their life has looked into the eyes of their children and said, "I really wish I would have put more hours in at the office." Our jobs are a necessary part of life, but they are not the most important part of life and that is the point Stanley is trying to drive home.
Stanley's advice for working towards a solution is very simple and very practical and that's probably what makes it so difficult. Yet, if it were easy, it wouldn't be worth it.
There's a quote in the book that I think will clinch your interest in reading the book without giving too much away.
"Making up your mind not to cheat your family anymore is a decision_Deciding not to cheat at home involves â€˜cutting off' those behaviors and habits that are contrary to your new conviction. Making up your mind isn't just about choosing an option_It's also about thoroughly eliminating all competing options. Choosing results in focus."