No More Christian Nice Girl: When Just Being Nice-Instead of Good-Hurts You, Your Family, and Your Friends  -     By: Paul Coughlin, Jennifer D. Degler
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No More Christian Nice Girl: When Just Being Nice-Instead of Good-Hurts You, Your Family, and Your Friends

Bethany House / 2010 / Paperback

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Product Description

For every woman who thinks being a Christian means always pleasing everybody! Brimming with enlightening information, thought-provoking questionnaires, real-life stories, and biblically based teaching, this empowering message will motivate you to emulate Jesus Christ; face your fears of conflict, rejection, and criticism; and allow God to transform you into an authentic, powerful woman of faith. 192 pages, softcover from Bethany.

Product Information

Format: Paperback
Number of Pages: 192
Vendor: Bethany House
Publication Date: 2010
Dimensions: 8.38 X 5.50 (inches)
ISBN: 0764207695
ISBN-13: 9780764207693
Availability: In Stock

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Publisher's Description

When passivity and false niceness don't bring the abundant life Jesus promised, some Christian women try even harder to hide behind a fragile façade of pleasant perfection. Paul Coughlin and Jennifer Degler give women the empowering message that they have options far beyond simply acting nice or being mean--if they will emulate the real Jesus Christ and face their fears of conflict, rejection, and criticism. Brimming with enlightening information, thought-provoking questionnaires, real-life stories, and biblically based teaching from both the male author of the pioneering No More Christian Nice Guy and a female clinical psychologist, this book will motivate women to allow God to transform them into authentic, powerful women of loving faith.

Author Bio

Paul Coughlin hosts a radio talk show in southern Oregon and is the author of No More Christian Nice Guy. Paul has been interviewed by C-SPAN, the New York Times, and numerous radio and television stations across the country. His articles have appeared in many publications, including New Man, Faithworks, and Ministries Today. He has also been editor of a weekly newspaper and a radio station program director. A former Christian Nice Guy, Paul is a happily married father. The Coughlin family lives in Medford, Oregon.

Jennifer D. Degler, PhD, is a licensed psychologist and life coach. A frequent speaker at women's events and marriage retreats, she also maintains a counseling practice, seeing adults, children, and couples for psychotherapy. She is a member of the American Association of Christian Counselors and the founder of Creating Christian Change, a life coaching enterprise that works with clients across the United States helping them to create lives they love. She has been interviewed by the Lexington Herald-Leader and local NBC and CBS affiliates as an expert in life coaching and mental health issues. Jennifer and her husband, Jeff, live in Lexington, Kentucky, with their two teenage children.

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  1. Sheri Cook
    Chicagoland
    Age: 45-54
    Gender: female
    4 Stars Out Of 5
    Reminds us that "nice" doesn't equal "good"
    January 27, 2011
    Sheri Cook
    Chicagoland
    Age: 45-54
    Gender: female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 4
    Meets Expectations: 4
    There is a lot of fakey-fakey niceness in the Christian community, even by people who don't mean to be hypocritical. The misbelief that "nice" equals "good" has plastered smiles over the top of gritted teeth. It's an excellent reminder that there are times when "good" has far more to do with "beneficial" than "pleasant" and therefore can have a bit more of an edge than is comfortable in many Christian camps.
  2. Austin
    Minnesota
    Age: 55-65
    Gender: female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    January 6, 2011
    Austin
    Minnesota
    Age: 55-65
    Gender: female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    I facilitate groups on codependency and this book will help women realize that learning to love/ take care of themselves requires setting healthy boundaries.
  3. Yukon01
    Chicago, IL
    Age: 45-54
    Gender: female
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    What "Having the Mind of Christ" really means
    November 3, 2010
    Yukon01
    Chicago, IL
    Age: 45-54
    Gender: female
    Quality: 5
    Value: 5
    Meets Expectations: 5
    This book is setting me free from years of trying to live a life where everyone is happy with what I do or say. The authors do a great job of pointing us to Christ, showing not only his gentle side, but the other side too, the one that got angry, frustrated, impatient and weary. I am so encouraged by reading this book, and am thinking of leading a Bible Study at church on this material.
  4. karen
    3 Stars Out Of 5
    An OK Read
    October 4, 2010
    karen
    Quality: 3
    Value: 2
    Meets Expectations: 2
    Sugar and Spice and all things nice - that's what little girls are made of. So we've been told, and have been expected to be in society for centuries. But Paul Coughlin and Jennifer Deglen say differently. Jesus expects Christians to be like him and although he was always loving,he was not always what today's society would consider nice. He was instead, GOOD. He did what was right no matter who was offended or who got upset. He was not afraid of whether others perceived him to be nice or not. And he expects us, as women, to be like him.

    Coughlin and Degler give examples of how we are nice but not good in our marriages, friendships, churches and workplaces. When we try to love up to every one else's expectations instead of obeying what God has for us we damage the relationships around us and instead end up burned out and resentful of all those that take advantage of our "nice-ness."

    I thought this book had some good things to say about being an authentic Christian. I especially liked their explanation of how conflict increases intimacy when handled correctly. I wasn't the biggest fan of their writing style, however. I thought the examples were a bit cheesy and I didn't like that they used acronyms for everything. It was a bit over the top for me - almost seemed a little condescending. But I thought they made valid points and I'm sure others would enjoy the writing style - it just wasn't my cup of tea :-)

    Thanks to Bethany House Publishers for a free copy of this book to review.
  5. Wanda Moncrief
    5 Stars Out Of 5
    September 20, 2010
    Wanda Moncrief
    No More Christian Nice Girl by Paul Coughlin & Jennifer D Degler, PhD is a wonderful read for the woman who does too much and is feeling stressed in life. If you are woman who has trouble saying "no" because you do not want to hurt other's feelings or have anyone disappointed in you, then this is the book for you. I am quite capable of saying "no" or "enough is enough" but I always feel guilty and do not want anyone upset with me. However, this book clearly shows that you can be nice but be firm in setting limit. The authors demonstrate that you can do good for others but also set limits on what you are willing to put up with from others especially those needy people who seem to want and need constantly which, in turn, literally sucks the life and energy from you every time you talk to them. The book touches on these issues in many situations such as friends, family, marriage, work, and intimacy. They use Biblical examples of women who have walked before us who knew when it was okay to be tough in a situation. We forget that Jesus was not even "nice" all of the time - remember when he overturned the tables in the temple? I learned a lot about myself in this book and Bible Study (there are questions at the end of each chapter). I learned that it is okay to be who I am a strong woman who helps others, is constantly busy but one who has learned to say no and without guilt. NOTE: I received this book from Bethany House as part of their Book Reviewer program.
Displaying items 1-5 of 23
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